Family

How We Met 2

I am pretty excited, okay EXTREMELY excited about the 2nd annual installment of “How We Met”- a series of love stories. I’ll be kicking it off on Monday, but before that I wanted to take a look back at last year’s couples and give an update of what’s gone on since this time last year. I’ll give you a hint. It starts with a B and ends with abies!

Karin and Cameron (the couple that were found to be compatible in a Lifespan development class) are expecting their first baby! They are having a girl and she is due in a couple weeks. Congratulations to them. I can’t wait to get the text when that sweet little bundle arrives!

Kailei and Brad (the couple that met in preschool) had a baby last March. Kailei emailed me recently and says “She has made our life even sweeter and we have loved every minute of being parents!” Congratulations to them too. She’s beautiful.

Andrea and Mike (the couple who met at the gym) ALSO had a baby! Solomon James was born November 3rd. He is their 8th boy in a row which the Doctor said is extremely rare. He sure is a precious little bird.

Nancy and Richard (the couple who met in the school parking lot) have a new grand baby! It’s my sweet Elle.

She is the 7th grandchild and my sister in law is due any day now. That will make 8 grandkids in 8 years for the Weavers.

The next baby is a boy so it will be 4 and 4!

Anyway, I couldn’t help but share the baby news I have from these lovely Messy Mom contributors. Be sure to come back on Monday when “How We Met” returns.

By Natalie|2021-04-29T18:27:39+00:00February 19, 2016|Marriage, Uncategorized|3 Comments

Acknowledging the Self Control Crisis

I recently did a book review of Strong and Kind by Korie Robertson. I mentioned the idea presented in the book to choose two character traits that you would want to be the main focus in your home.

J and I chose Self-Controlled and Compassionate as our two character traits. J was the one to choose self-control and I went along with it because we are in this together. I have to be honest though, I really struggled with the idea of self-control as one of our main family goals. That did not sound like fun to me. It didn’t even sound biblical. Yes I do realize self-control is a fruit of the spirit, but subconsciously I hear the word “self” and I think “selfish” then add the word control and I think “controlling”. There is nothing I dislike more than a selfish controlling person. All we need is love right?

You guys must think I am crazy. The rest of you are probably obsessed with self-control and have it mastered.

So to avoid resentment about the very thing I am supposed to be imparting to my children I did a little research.

Scripture and truth about self-control began to resonate with me. It’s not glamorous. You won’t hear of people being honored at their funerals for how much self-control they had.

It’s a big deal though. It’s in the Bible for a reason and I am 100% on board with making it a priority in our home.

Obviously self-control that is contrived by legalism will only leave you feeling like a failure. On our own there is no way we can have a healthy balanced sense of self-discipline. Biblical self-control however is critical. It means having a backbone in the face of temptation and denying one’s flesh. It’s doing the exact opposite of what our culture says to do (which would only leave us hopeless in the end). The lust of the flesh is an ever increasing craving for an ever diminishing pleasure as C.S. Lewis puts it.

Proverbs 25:28 says a man without self-control is like a city broken and left without walls. I have seen the affects of this. I’ve watched powerful ministries ripped to shreds due to a lack of self-control. It can cost you everything. You can have so much success that you are standing among the stars, but without following God’s command for self control the enemy has the perfect opportunity to kick the ladder right out from under you. Having self-control actually amplifies and supports the other spiritual fruits. It allows you to have integrity as you serve and move in the gifts of the spirit. I definitely want that for my children.

So when it comes to self-control as a core value in our home I’m still not like Ohhh yay! I love self-control. I know my kid’s will too. Now let’s practice by setting a jar of forbidden candy on the coffee table. Woo hoo!

What I do know though is that the media is screaming indulgence! Our society reeks of entitlement. We are a nation of instant gratification who would rather point fingers than take responsibility for anything. We have a self-control deficiency!

Enough is enough. It’s going to take an intentional effort on my part to teach my children the truth. God has given us instructions, a path, and a plan. The Holy Spirit guides us and has given us the reins of self-control. I want myself and my family to grab ahold of those reins.

So I run with purpose in every step. I am not just shadowboxing. I discipline my body like an athlete, training it to do what it should. Otherwise, I fear that after preaching to others I myself might be disqualified.

-1 Corinthians 9:26

By Natalie|2016-02-03T14:06:38+00:00February 2, 2016|My Life, Parenting Tips, Uncategorized|0 Comments

Hanging My Hat

I took this week off from blogging. Not because I didn’t feel like writing (because I really have). I just needed to focus on Elle this week. We had 4 different appointments so it’s been intense.

After waiting a month for these evaluations, and really hoping for some concrete answers, we walked away with more questions. It wasn’t bad news. It was just conflicting. I feel like my hands are tied right now and I have prayed Lord is this just a season of waiting? Is there anything I can do to help my daughter? and I felt in my heart the word that was given to me at the beginning of the year. Next. And I was reminded to do the next right thing.

So I called our current audiologist and asked if I could just come meet her in person and she graciously agreed. She allowed me to stop by right then! How amazing is that? We sat down and talked. She answered my questions. We came up with a plan. I needed a plan guys. I am a planner. I was willing to not have one if it was the right thing, but this was an answer to prayer for me.

The plan right now is to hold off on hearing aids. With her head still being wobbly and her still sleeping so much, the hearing aid would be more of a nuisance than it would be beneficial. Once she is upright and on the move then we will do a hearing aid in the left ear.

Granted all of this could change. There is so much up in the air right now. I feel like my entire head is up in the air. My mom likes to use the idiom “where do you hang your hat?” and that is it. I needed to hang my hat on something! Another month of waiting for the next ENT visit, ABR, or genetic testing results would just make me go crazy. I can’t hold onto this hat. I need to hang it and so for now I know that is no hearing aids, I will continue with early intervention therapy, and continue monitoring for fluid and hearing tests. Even if it changes, I’m going to be okay, but for now that’s the plan . That’s the next right thing.

Thank you for all of the prayers. I know that they have made an impact.

By Natalie|2016-01-30T22:10:14+00:00January 30, 2016|Special Needs, Uncategorized|4 Comments

Strong and Kind

I decided that instead of a brief synopsis at the end of the year of all of the books that I remember reading, I would do a review (or at least share some thoughts) of the books as I read them one at a time.

I just finished Strong and Kind: and Other Important Character Traits Your Child Needs to Succeed by Korie Robertson.

I feel guilty because I kind of gave the book a bad wrap when I shared on Facebook last week. I said I was anxious to move on to another book and admitted to falling asleep reading it. It’s not my all time favorite parenting book and I’ll admit, not being a Duck Dynasty fan probably takes away a lot of the appeal. However, I did glean some valuable wisdom from Strong and Kind and I am really glad I read it.

The title Strong and Kind are the two main character traits that the Korie and Willie Robertson wanted to instill in their kids as they were raising them. Toward the beginning of the book there is a list of character traits to pull from.

The idea is to choose your top two from the list and be intentional about teaching these habits to your children as well as exhibiting them yourself. Of course it’s hard to choose just two. We want all of them. Korie even mentions that in the book. You should want all of them and strive for all of them. But by choosing two above the rest you can really focus and have a better chance of actually following through because you are making it a priority.

Here is the list and I don’t remember if you are “supposed to” add your own, but I don’t see why not.

I sent this list to J and it took him days to decide. I was more inclined to choose the first two that popped out to me. I’m not too surprised. That really is typical of our personalities. He chose words of power and determination, while mine were more about the heart and emotions. Again, I am not surprised. We’re opposites (remember my Ricky and Lucy comparison?). I like to think that we balance each other out. So we settled on one of his words and one of mine. That is how we came up with Self-Control and Compassion. I bet you can guess who chose what.

I’ve been thinking and studying what these words really mean and what the Bible has to say about them. It’s been a very positive experience and I plan to share more soon.

What two words do you think you would choose for you family? I know it’s hard, but even thinking about it is a good exercise every parent should consider. So despite my skepticism in the end I did like Strong and Kind and if you like the Duck Dynasty clan then I would definitely recommend it.

By Natalie|2016-01-21T22:55:46+00:00January 21, 2016|Parenting Tips|1 Comment

I wasn’t going to do a word for the year this year, but then God just sort of dropped this in my lap and was like Yes you are.

The first way the word “Next” came to me was because I was wondering what this next chapter of our story would be. We have overcome many of the major life hurdles that we have encountered over the past 4 years. We found a house to rent. We had our 4th and final child. My husband completed school and got a job that is an actual career. I feel like we are entering a new season of life and are ready for the NEXT chapter.

Then the word came to me again in something that my Children’s pastor (from way back when) wrote in a comment that she left when I shared my birth story. She said how proud she was of my “determination to just do the next right thing”.

Just do the next right thing.

I had never heard of this quote before, but I have been mentally chewing on it ever since. It fits the scenario of my birth story so well because I had to focus on each thing, step by step. The baby was going to come so I acted on it. After that her head was out and I knew I needed to do one more push and get her body out. After that I knew I needed to wrap her up. After that put her on my chest. After that call the hospital and so on.

There was no planning it out. I was just doing the next right thing. It’s all I could do.

Since then baby Elle has been diagnosed with hearing loss and there is so much that we don’t know. Will she loose all her hearing? Will she have hearing aids? Will she need therapy? For how long? I can’t see the whole picture at all. No one can. It drives me crazy. What I can do is rely on God and just do the next right thing. So there is that word again. NEXT.

Lastly, I feel like the Lord has also prompted me to get help from those NEXT to me. When SJ was diagnosed we had just moved. All of my friends were far away in another state and it was tough. Here we are nearly four years later and I still have friends far away, but I have so many friends that are close by too. All of these women have been texting me, praying for me, and encouraging me. I need that more than anything! I need those neighbors, partners, allies to come along side me and walk NEXT to me as I go through this uncharted territory.

The next season of life. The next right thing. The people next to me.

NEXT.

I can’t wait to see what happensas I continue to unwrap the word and all that it holds for 2016.

By Natalie|2016-01-04T00:16:05+00:00January 4, 2016|My Life, Pregnancy & Birth, Uncategorized|8 Comments

This Time is Different

I sat in the exam room with a tightness in my throat. I had felt fine, but as the reality of it all sank in the emotions rose up. I began to cry hot tears. I felt the need to apologize because I don’t like making other people feel uncomfortable. The audiologist responded in a firm voice ” Do not apologize.” She told me that I was completely entilted to respond any way I wanted and that just because I have been there before that does not make it any easier.

This was what happened a week and a half ago at Elle’s ABR hearing screening. As you can imagine this means that the results were not good. I thought Elle could hear, and I was right. She can hear. She responds to many different sounds, but she still has hearing loss and it’s in both ears. I wasn’t going to talk about it until I knew more, but I am ready to talk about it now. Especially since I just got off the phone with the early intervention specialists who are ready to come over and set up her first IFSP. SJ has an IEP which is an Individualized Education Program because she is in school. Before that you have an Individual Family Service Plan which is when case worker helps you come up with appropriate strategies or goals for your preschool age child with special needs.

So just like that Elle has Special Needs. She is 6 weeks old and already considered delayed because she can’t hear well. I am being blunt, but don’t worry. I am not concerned for her. I think labels are silly. I remember when I was being interviewed for a research study and I was asked how I felt about my daughter’s “exceptionality” and I said “Excuse me? Her what?”. “Exceptionality” she repeated. That’s what they are calling it now. I laughed at such a desperate attempt to not offend. I am comfortable with hearing loss, deafness, disability, exceptionality whatever you want to call it. It does however mean our calendar, our budget, and even major life decisions like where to live will look different over the next few years because of this.

Hearing that my daughter has hearing loss is so different this time. I continue to process a myriad of emotions. On the one hand Elle’s hearing loss is mild. It’s complicated and I won’t go into all the details, but that’s good news. SJ’s hearing loss was profound. At least by the time we found out it was. When Elle had her appointment J explained that we speculate SJ had previously had more hearing, but then lost it over time. He asked if that could happen with Elle. The audiologist said it certainly could. That’s a hard fact to swallow. I don’t know if I should assume the worst and hope for the best? I have a lot of questions for her ENT.

On that note, the fact that we already have an ENT, an audiologist, a school, and a support group in place is awesome! With SJ I was given a stack of books for parents of deaf children and I felt completely overwhelmed. This time is different. I have a newborn instead of a toddler. I live in Ohio rather than Kentucky. I will be dealing with hearing aids rather than cochlear implants (at least for now). I feel fairly equipped, but also uncertain.

I have so many questions and other concerns, but I will have to wait another month to even talk to certain specialists. The day of Elle’s hearing test was the first day of Christmas break for the kids and we went right into all of the Holiday gatherings. First was celebration with my family followed by a week of festivities with my in laws. That was actually good timing though because I had no obligations and have been pretty much distracted by Christmasy things. However now we prepare for evaluations, testing, hearing aids, and therapies. It’s really happening. I am doing okay, but I am also a bit of a basket case from time to time. Elle on the other hand is doing great. She is such a precious treasure and we all adore her.

I know many of my family and friends are going to be finding out about this for the first time. I didn’t know the best way to deliver this announcement. It’s not dreadful news like a terminal illness or something, but it’s not like announcing a pregnancy either.

I hope you’ll bear with me as I navigate this new journey because it might look similar, but this time is different.

By Natalie|2023-06-12T06:26:11+00:00December 28, 2015|Babies, Hearing Loss, My Life, Our Hearing Loss Journey|22 Comments

Awaiting the ABR… Again

Elle is now 5 weeks old. She had her one month check up this week and is now 10 pounds 22 inches. The Doctor has been extremely impressed by her growth. Here is a side by side from her first check up and her last which were taken exactly 4 weeks apart. Elle looks completely different.

She is really filling out. No more newborn diapers or clothes for her. She has outgrown them!

There aren’t a lot of updates. She smiles now, but it’s not often.

She still sleeps about 18 hours a day.

I did a little impromptu photo shoot of her on her 1 month birthday.

I love that she was born close to the holidays. I think about how our birth story was so unconventional and I wonder how Mary must have felt and what her birth story would be like (of course we know the story, but not from the perspective of Mary).

We have an important appointment coming up and I would love it if you would be in prayer for us during this time. I previously mentioned that Elle failed the newborn hearing screening. The first time they came in with the equipment to test her the tech lady had a unique personality and was rowdy. I think she was trying to be nice. For most people this is just a routine test. No reason to get too serious, but all kinds of faculty were coming in and out and joking around and making a racket so Elle woke up and was fussy for the second half of the test (the left side). So she failed on the left, but the boisterous tech assured us it was because she woke up and that’s all it was.

The next day a younger new tech came in while it was still dark and quiet in our hospital room. I asked if she could shut the door and maybe hang a do not disturb note or something. She looked at my like I was crazy, but at least it was a much more subdued and calmer atmosphere. She even let me nurse Elle during the test. Again Elle passed on the right, but she couldn’t even get a reading on the left. It was like it wasn’t hooked up right so the tech tried to adjust it. She never was able to figure out what was wrong so she said that she failed and she would refer us to an audiologist. I was hormonal, and tired, and obviously stressed so I sternly proclaimed “We have an audiologist. This is a big concern for us and I’d like to know what is going on” Then J and I asked more questions about the test. None of which she could answer. She looked really intimidated. She had never even heard of Connexin 26 which is the genetic hearing loss that we have in our family. It is the NUMBER ONE CAUSE of sensorineural deafness so you would think someone that tests for hearing loss would have some familiarity with it. I then asked to speak with a supervisor and did, but she mostly just had some paperwork for me.

I immediately called SJ’s school and talked to our audiologist. She made me feel much better about the whole thing and gave me advice on how to proceed.

I know a lot about hearing loss and I think Elle can hear. I feel very confident in that. I guess you could say we know she can because the test confirmed it on the right side. With Connexin 26 it is highly unlikely that it would be unilateral (only on one side) so chances are she is fine.

However, this whole thing brings up a lot of tender memories for me. We have to go through all the same testing that we did with SJ and we have to keep her asleep for 90 minutes which should be easy considering what I said about her sleep, but it’s still completely unpredictable and out of our control so that stresses me out.

I cried when I called and scheduled the appointment. I have openly expressed to people how I know that she is fine and it’s just a machine error which happens all the time. And hearing children do fail this test A LOT.

However, lately there have been other thoughts popping into my head that make me wonder why it was the left ear BOTH times. Maybe just a coincidence? I mean if something is going to go wrong with the test you have a 50/50 chance that it will be on the left side. Still part of me wonders if she has another problem on that side that doesn’t even have to do with Connexin 26. Or what if her hearing gets progressively worse, which can happen. What if she is one of those rare cases?

Luckily, most of these frantic thoughts didn’t really come into my mind until this week so at least I haven’t spent the past 4 weeks panicking.

Please pray that we get some answers with this test. I do have a peace about it, and all in all I think everything is going to be okay, but I hate the idea that if she doesn’t sleep we have to drag this out for another month or so. That would be terrible. I just want this to be over with.

The reason I titled this “Awaiting the ABR… Again” is because I wrote another post about 3 1/2 years ago when I was waiting for this same test for SJ. You can read “Awaiting the ABR” to find out what the test is and what the waiting period was like for me in that time when I didn’t know for sure whether or not SJ was deaf. It feels like a world away.

Thanks for all the prayers and support. Of course I will keep you posted.

By Natalie|2023-06-12T06:29:15+00:00December 16, 2015|Babies, Hearing Loss, My Life, Our Hearing Loss Journey, Pregnancy & Birth|4 Comments

The Smallest Person. The Most Laundry.

In the past three weeks my mom, my husband, and I have all collaboratively worked toward keeping the piles of dirty laundry from taking over house. It’s like some kind of horror movie. I could just picture the clothes eventually coming to life and forming a mutiny. Instead of The Walking Dead it’s The Walking Threads.

I am grateful for the help I have had with these excess loads of laundry, but since when did washing clothes become such a massive effort? It feels like it is endless! All because of a sweet little baby? How could one tiny new family member triple our laundry?

Her socks could fit on my thumbs. An entire new born baby outfit is smaller than one of my three year old’s pant legs. It’s not like she is a fashionista. She’s three weeks old! WHERE IS ALL THIS LAUNDRY COMING FROM?

When I really stop and think about it, it does make sense though.

Sure she’s cute and small, but don’t let that fool you. She’s a mess.

Every time I change her diaper she pees. I try to be really fast and wipe her while the dirty diaper is underneath and then get a clean one on her bottom immediately, but somehow in that brief moment with no diaper she always pees and it’s often accompanied by poop. I have learned to put a changing pad under her, but then that means her outfit and the changing pad are now soiled and need to go into the hamper.

For her first Doctor’s appointment she peed on their exam table and then I picked her up so that they could change the paper out and she pooped ALL OVER ME. She wasn’t even 8 pounds at the time so it’s pretty amazing that she could even hold that much bright mustardy yellow poo and yet there it was, all over my shirt.

Ohhh and the spit up! Projectile spit up. Spit up everywhere.

Maybe you are familiar with the Moby Wrap? It’s cool. My sister in law is letting me borrow hers. How it works is that you wrap yourself and the baby with 5 yards of fabric. Then you get enough spit up or a blow out diaper on that thing and that’s a half a load of laundry right there.

Plus all the burp cloths, sheets and blankets that get pee, poop, or spit up on them.

I can’t really blame her for my leaky breasts, but I kind of can, so I will. I usually wear pajamas several times before washing them because I generally don’t have a reason to. Well, that used to be the case. Now I am lucky if I don’t have to change shirts in the middle of the night. YIKES!

Blankets + sheets + wraps + shirts + pants + changing pads + baby = a BUNCH of laundry.

It’s all good though. Before you know it I’ll be hauling her prom dress off to the dry cleaner. I look forward to those days too, but for now I’m cherishing all the burp cloths…

and teeny tiny jeggings.

By Natalie|2015-12-07T17:28:49+00:00December 7, 2015|Babies, Laughter|3 Comments

Her First 3 Weeks (with photos)

I recently shared how difficult the first three weeks postpartum have been for me, but the good news is Elle would never know it. Her life has been comfy and sheltered.

I feel like being born two weeks early really did make a difference for her. My sister in law said she has friends who had preemies and noticed that on their original 40 week due date it was like they suddenly had an alert fully developed baby. Elle wasn’t a born premature (she was 8 pounds!) but she did practically sleep through her first two weeks of life and I wonder if that’s why.

I know my mom was slightly concerned, but the Doctors said as long as she’s eating, pooping, and gaining weight then she’s good. She definitely was doing all of those things so I’ll take it as a blessing that she was so easy going.

Sure enough on her due date she started acting like she was “out of the womb”

From then on she was so much more alert. Her eyes were really wide open and she would express herself a little more. She had several “firsts” at two weeks.

She went to church for the first time.

She visited SJ’s school. On a side note, I could be a millionaire and it wouldn’t matter. There is nothing in the world that I could buy or do for SJ that would amount to the kind happiness that she gets from her little sister and the joy of having a baby to help take care of.

She and all of her classmates have been anticipating the arrival of baby Elle for a LONG time and I told her she would be able to have her visit her school before Thanksgiving break, but then I got sick. I was so worried about canceling the plans I made with the teacher and with SJ because I knew it would devastate her.

So I took a Motrin and rode over to the school, but my mom was the one that actually went in and introduced the baby (I wasn’t contagious or anything, but I was just feeling too fatigued and achey thanks to my bladder infection). I was sad that I missed it, but I got to see pictures and it sounds like the introduction went really well.

The other two week milestone was that Elle had her first bath. She liked the water, but she didn’t like being cold afterwards!

She also had her first Thanksgiving, although that was pretty uneventful since she didn’t eat anything and slept the whole time.

She is three weeks old now. I don’t have the latest photos uploaded yet. She is getting control of that neck though and trying to lift her head up. She seems to like to sit upright more (with support of course) rather than being completely in the cradle position.

I have been blessed that all 4 of my children breastfed really easily. Elle has had no problems latching on and she loves to eat.

The biggest obstacle we’ve faced with her so far is thrush, but my friend gave me some Colloidal Silver and I just put a drop on my finger and rubbed it around in her mouth once a day and it cleared right up. Her diaper rash is gone too, but it was really inflamed so we used nystatin cream for that.

I’ll admit I am hormonal and emotional these days. It’s been bitter sweet to watch how quickly they change from being a tiny precious infant. I used to not care for the newborn stage so much. I wanted to skip to the part where they were walking and interacting. Now I LOVE this stage of innocence and simplicity. I absolutely adore it.

And her dad and siblings are just obsessed as I am.

Next up, baby’s first Christmas!

By Natalie|2015-12-03T11:40:50+00:00December 3, 2015|Babies|5 Comments

Elle’s Birth Story

When I planned to have my baby at a birthing center that was an hour from our house I got a lot of different reactions from concerned people thinking that would be too far of a drive. However, this was my 4th baby and all three of my other pregnancies and deliveries were pretty consistent. So I felt like I knew my body well enough to get there with time to spare.

Monday (November 9th) gave me NO indication that I was anywhere close to being in labor. It was nothing like my other births where I had mild contractions that built all day long. Nothing was happening. Not even braxton hicks. Plus I was only 37 weeks along.

That night I fell asleep earlier than usually, but I woke up at 10:30 pm and that’s when things got weird.

I was confused by the signs. I had lower back pain and some pressure, but I hadn’t had any contractions. I told J (my husband) that I didn’t feel good and then I felt the first contraction at 10:41 pm.

I called my parents to come stay with the kids who were asleep in bed. I had only had one measly contraction at this point, but my parents live an hour and a half away and I just knew something was up! I tried to relax in a bath which is supposed to slow things down if it’s false labor, but instead I just started freaking out. Not because of contractions, but because I felt pressure. I felt nauseous. I was trembling and it looked an awful lot like transition!

I told J that I was scared and I wanted to go to a closer hospital. I had no idea where or what that would be. I felt so confused and panic set in. J said we just needed to get in the car and go, but I was insistent that we couldn’t go because I didn’t want to bring the kids.

At about 11:40 pm we loaded up the van with our partially packed bags and three groggy kids who were all in footie pajamas. My parents would have to meet us at the birth center. The contractions were strong, but they were still only 10 minutes apart and I was relieved because I assumed that meant we would have plenty of time.

About 11:50 things started getting intense. I was praying out loud. I would sing worship songs through contractions and really tried to stay focused.

Moments later the contractions were coming one on top of the other. As soon as one would stop another would begin and I vocalized this to J. Then we began to pray. I started praying with authority

“Lord, you are in control. I trust in you! I will not have this baby in the car. We are going to make it to the hospital in JESUS NAME. Labor has to stop until we get to safety!”

I was declaring very specific things and I can look back and laugh at it now, but I was serious about it. I have never wanted an unassisted birth. I was not comfortable with the idea of having the baby in the car.

Then when we were about 15 miles away I knew God wasn’t answering my prayer in the way I was hoping. The baby was coming. There is no fighting it. I had done this before and when the baby is ready to be born you can not stop it. So I gave in, and let me tell you the grace and peace of God was all over that van. My mindset changed to being very assertive. It’s weird. I became my own midwife and I narrated everything that was happening out loud. I can’t tell you why I did this, but hey, it worked out.

Here is the dialogue that transpired. J and I were both completely calm. It had to have been the Holy Spirit because even the kids were calm (one was asleep).

Me: Okay. I feel the urge to push. I am taking off my seat belt. I am going to have to take off my pants now.

I had on a long T-shirt and a sweatshirt, and I quickly removed my cotton sweat pants. I was in the front passenger seat with my body slightly tilted and right leg lifted up and apart from my left. Luckily I had brought a towel and had it under me.

J: Do you want me to pull over?

Me: No, by the time the paramedics get here we would have already been to the hospital. Just keep driving.

Plus it was a dangerous freeway and dark and rainy. We both felt this was a safer option given our proximity to the hospital.

J: Do you need any light?

Me: No.

Then I reach down to see if I am imagining it, but I do feel the top of the baby’s head crowning.

Me: Okay I feel the head.

After another contraction her head was out and I had my hands gently cupping her head.

Me: The head is out. Alright. We need the body to come out now. Come on baby girl with the next contraction I am going to push the body out.

Another contraction and a slight push from me. I felt the shoulders and the body being pushed out. I kept my right hand under her head and my left hand scooped her up under her armpit and behind her back.

Me: I am going to wrap her in my pants and put her on my chest now.

And I did

J: She is crying. Good. Does it look like she’s okay?

Me: Yes, she’s fine.

I looked over at my husband as I held my now calm daughter who was so peaceful and perfect. Everything was quiet as we rode along in the dark .

Me: Is this real? Did that really happen… or am I in a dream?

J: Yes. It’s real.

After that we called the birth center (which is inside of a hospital by the way). This was at 12:27 am. There was a team of nurses with a wheel chair waiting for us at the entrance. I felt like a million bucks as we rolled up and they congratulated me and helped me get my shoes back on. I was fully prepared to hop out of the car when it hit me. The adrenaline drained from my body. I was light headed. I felt pain. My “super powers” were gone and I was bleeding. I know that sounds so dramatic, but it really did happen like that.

Since I couldn’t get out of the car they had to put me on a stretcher and roll me into the hospital where a Doctor would check on me and the baby. That’s when I delivered the placenta.

They reminded me to breath and as I did I felt relief. It was over and we were both doing fine, but I knew it would be a while before it all really sunk in.

My parents showed up shortly after that. We all chatted in the hospital room and watched in awe as they washed, weighed, and measured the miraculous little package that had turned our world upside down.

I didn’t expect her to be 2 weeks early. I didn’t expect the labor to be so fast. I wasn’t prepared for any of it. Still, God is Faithful and in the end I am really glad our entire family was together in the brand new mini van that no one is allowed to even eat or drink in! It was really special.

So that’s my fourth birth story.

There’s the one at the birth center, the one in the bathtub at home, the one at the hospital, and now the one in a moving vehicle. Yes there are more options for birth locations, but I think that’s enough adventures for me, at least of this nature.

The End.

Or in Ellis’s case the beginning.