The Curated Life

I feel like curated is a buzzword. All of a sudden I am hearing everything curated. I did a curated clothes swap last year. There are curated subscription boxes that are all the rage right now where they hand select the items you get. A website content curator is a professional that helps you sift through your website and see what is going to be the most effective content for your marketing strategies.

So you get the idea. It’s a filtering process. Everything we do usually goes through a filter and that’s not a bad thing. We need filters to clean our water and our air. We need filters to prevent us from saying hurtful things that we think about people sometimes.  Except for curating, editing, censoring, and filtering often get a bad wrap because we crave seeing the authentic. That’s another buzzword: authentic. Everyone is tired of seeing fake, photoshopped, airbrushed images. We want the real and the raw. We want to be able to relate to what we see.

Two things popped up in my news feed recently that reminded me of this.

Kate Middleton

LONDON, ENGLAND – APRIL 23: Catherine, Duchess of Cambridge and Prince William, Duke of Cambridge depart the Lindo Wing with their newborn son at St Mary’s Hospital on April 23, 2018 in London, England. The Duchess safely delivered a son at 11:01 am, weighing 8lbs 7oz, who will be fifth in line to the throne. (Photo by Karwai Tang/WireImage)

Chip and Joanna Gaines.

Kate Middleton walked out of her birthing unit looking like a princess hours after having an 8+ pound baby. Nevermind the fact that she is actually literal royalty. Some people felt sorry for her because she should be bonding with her baby and recovering, not wearing heels and a dainty dress. Some people felt sorry for themselves because they looked like crap after having a baby and stayed looking that way for the remainder of their child rearing years. I could probably identify with both camps on this one.

 

Then an article came out about Chip and Joanna Gaines and how they claim to put family first but they obviously do not put family first because they have their own royal empire in the home decor world. How could any couple with a 40 acre ranch, two best-selling books and a third one on the way, a quarterly magazine, an online store, a restaurant, an interior design company, a blog, an exclusive line of products for Target, a wallpaper line, and so much more still be able to spend quality time with their kids?

Chip took his rebuttal to Twitter with this response

I agree that with God all things are possible. I agree that they are the ultimate example of family-focused entrepreneurs. I also believe that they probably wonder if they are failing their children and if their work life and home life is balanced. I don’t think this because they have a bajillion irons in the fire. I think this because they are human!  I struggle mom guilt and priorities and I am a stay at home mom!

I am guessing that if you had the unedited Gaines family you would still have a loving couple with adorable kids who all love Jesus and you would also have a whole lot of imperfections and struggles just like the rest of us. They probably talk about this in their books. I haven’t read them.

I only bring this up because as a small time blogger, or even just a girl on Facebook, I am selective of what I post online. I think it’s okay to show a curated life to a broad audience! On the one hand, I want to keep it real with a blog name like MESSY mom and blog post like the one where I had a nervous breakdown, but I don’t need to air out all my dirty laundry. I save that for the people I love most. I know that sounds funny but it’s true. I have intimacy with those that I am actually connected with.

The more intimacy we have with someone the more vulnerable and transparent we are to the point that in sexual intimacy we actually take off ALL the layers and are completely exposed.  Intimacy doesn’t have to be sexual though. Intimacy can be sharing tears, or scars, or memories. Intimacy is a closeness and a connection that is always mutual. If it’s not mutual then it’s not intimacy.

The problem is that we have a false sense of intimacy in our culture today. From pornography to celebrity gossip we start to feel like we have access when we really don’t. It’s a one way street. It’s not mutual and it’s not intimacy. We only have access to the filtered edited production. Therefore we think we know that person on Instagram or that family on TV and we think they are perfect and we live inferior lives that will never measure up. Or we think we can defend or criticize them as if we really know who they are what they should and shouldn’t share.

No matter what your opinions are about these celebrities let’s just remember we are only seeing the curated version of their lives. I don’t know anyone that is intimate with Kate Middleton or Chip and Joanna Gaines except maybe some of my Texas friends who claim to be because they saw them at their cousin’s baby dedication back in 2001, but let’s be honest.

If you are craving something real and authentic try turning to people you can actually connect with in real life and don’t worry about that celebrity or social media mumbo jumbo. I can assure you the real life connections are a thousand times better anyway.

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By | May 1st, 2018|Uncategorized|0 Comments

Inspiring Mom Lauren Béa


Today I am so excited to introduce this month’s Inspiring Mom, singer song writer Lauren Béa! Her latest single, Sovereign Still was just released and is available for download everywhere you stream music. Sovereign Still is an upbeat song that will get in your head and you will be glad it is!  For me it serves as a much needed reminder that God is in control!

 




Lauren has been spending a lot of her time lately in the studio working on her upcoming album, so be on the lookout for that because it’s going to be amazing. Her music is produced by Otto Price who has also produced music for King and Country and BarlowGirl. I had to name drop here because I own albums from both of those bands and love them.

Lauren writes from a heart of worship and her songs are written about her life, faith, and family all of which she talks about in our recent interview so let’s get right to it!

First off I asked Lauren to tell us about her beautiful family and she said

” My husband is an NFL linebacker and we have been married for 3 years.

We have one daughter named Kaidence. She is two years and a half years old and I can honestly say that motherhood is the best thing that has ever happened to me. My favorite part of motherhood would be when Kaidence shows affection back to me, or seeing her learn and discover new things. The look and passion in her eyes is what completely melts me.”

 

They are the cutest family ever and I wanted to post a million pictures here but I used restraint. To see all the sweetness you can join the thousands of others who are already following Lauren on Instagram @laurenbeamusic. You can also see more on Youtube where Lauren and Keenan have allowed us a peek into their lives on their youtube channel and that is so much fun to watch.

I especially love this video that shows an inside look at the sidelines as an NFL family.

I asked Lauren to share her thoughts about her husband’s career in the NFL and she said

“I do love the NFL life, however it has its pros and cons. I love getting to see my husband do what he loves but the injuries do not make it worth it to me. Most people do not see the behind the scenes of this life. After every game his body feels like it has been in an accident, he has cuts all over his body and he is just completely worn out. It’s hard seeing continuous injuries like torn muscles and broken bones but I am supportive because it is what he loves to do.”

While Keenan’s passion is playing football, Lauren’s passion is definitely singing.

She started singing when she was six years old she said, “I used to take my mom’s walkman, listen to Whitney Houston and Celine Dion and sing along at the top of my lungs.” and she’s worked hard ever since then to get where she is today. Lauren says  “It takes a lot of behind the scenes work before a lot of things even come forth. I have spent numerous hours writing and creating in the studio and working on the business side of it! When you finally see the finished product it makes everything worth it!”

One of her other singles is called Wild Flower and it is an anthem for women everywhere. 

I asked Lauren what inspired Wild Flower and she said

“I wanted to write a song that empowered women. When I was writing the song, the image of a wildflower popped into my head. Wildflowers are naturally beautiful as they are. You do not have to add anything to their beauty and they stand tall in their existence. Women too should embrace being like wildflowers accepting who they are completely and knowing they are beautiful no matter what.”

I absolutely love that message and I love how Lauren not only sings about it but she shows what true strength and beauty is to her daughter and to all that look up to her as an artist.

My last question for Lauren was asking her how she balances family life and her spiriutual walk with careers that keep them on the road and in the spotlight. Her answer is one that we could all benefit from no matter what our hobbies or careers are:

“It is all about balance. I am still figuring this out myself but I know my days go so much smoother when I spend time with the Lord before my morning begins. Once my heart is right, everything else will be also. I also have to set aside specific time for doing music and being with my family. I really have to be intentional on where my mind is at the moment and if I am with my family, my mind needs to be with my family and not on music.”

That really was my last question but then this pictuer popped up in Lauren’s feed and I had to ask, How the heck did you end up meeting Oprah!?

She said they met at Minnie’s Food Pantry Gala, which is a non profit organization they give to and serve with every year. Pretty cool.

To keep up with Lauren you can find her album, videos, updates and all that on her website or on most social media platforms under the handle “laurenbeamusic”. I already mentioned that she is on instagram and youtube, but you can also follow her on twitter, facebook, and  spotify .

 

I want to thank Lauren for sharing part of her story with us. We can’t wait to hear what’s next for Lauren Béa music!

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By | April 25th, 2018|Uncategorized|2 Comments

Gorgeous Graduation Announcements by Basic Invite

Graduation season is here and I have so many reasons to get excited about doing a review for Basic Invite.

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This fresh innovative stationary company will be your go-to for all of your graduation announcements, commencement invitations, and graduation thank you cards. They actually cover weddings, birthdays, and everything in between too, but my mind is all about graduation right now.

 

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First of all, I have been busy with my photography business photographing lots of high school seniors.

 

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This weekend I am even photographing a prom. I can’t wait.

 

On top of that, my little SJ is graduating from her deaf school after going there for 5 years!

 

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This is no ordinary elementary school graduation. She’s been working so hard to learn to communicate and to get to this point is almost like graduating college!

I have spent a ton of time researching the best options for graduation invitations and thank you cards for her big day.

 

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Here is the thing about Basic Invite, not only are their designs jaw dropping, but unlike other stationary and photo card websites, they are truly customizable. I was blown away by the options. There was one card I loved but knew the burgundy background would clash with SJ photo. Once I realized I could easily change that AND the font AND the amount of text boxes I was ecstatic. I’ve never seen anything like this. The possibilities are endless, but if you don’t want to mess with all that you could just leave it as is and be done in seconds! It is so simple. You can even customize the envelope from over 40 different colors.

 

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Another thing that sets Basic Invite apart is the custom samples. It is one of the few websites that allows customers the ability to order a printed sample of your actual invitation so that you can see exactly how it will print as well as the paper quality before you ever have to place their final order! They also have the “love it guarantee”. I’m sure after you’ve seen your sample and gotten your order you will be thrilled but if not, Basic Invite will either reprint it or let you return your items for a full refund. You really can’t go wrong.

Basic Invite also offers an address capturing service. This service allows customers to simply share a link on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, or any other form of social media to request their friends and family’s addresses which will be stored in the customer’s account and can then be selected during the design process. Basic Invite offers recipient address printing at no cost on all Christmas card orders. This part really caught my attention! Basic Invite makes the whole process fun and easy.

If you are wanting to find deals and updates about Basic Invite you can find them at @basicinvite on most social media platforms like Facebook, Pinterest, Instagram, and Twitter.

So check out the website and all the awesome designs. Drop in a cute photo of your grad and then tear up because it’s so beautiful and you can’t believe this moment has actually arrived! I know that’s what I’ve been doing.

Last but certainly not least, right now you can get 15% off with coupon code: 15FF51

Have fun selecting your personalized prints!


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By | April 16th, 2018|Uncategorized|0 Comments

A Year of Isabella

It’s been a year since Isabella came to our home and if you haven’t already heard the whole story you should read ” Meet Isabella

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It will most certainly warm your heart. With all the hate and discord in the world, there is still so much love and kindness among us, even from strangers. The short story is that SJ was given a brand new American Girl Doll for her birthday a year ago from someone we don’t even know!

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The idea was that the doll could get hearing aids and SJ would be able to have a doll that she could relate to.

Since receiving Isabella a year ago she was able to ride to MINNEAPOLIS MINNESOTA to the American Girl doll store in the mall of America to get hearing aids on the spot! Thanks to Mémé (my mom) for this trip of a lifetime, working for Delta has its perks!

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SJ loves taking care of Isabella. She fixes her hair and changes her outfits to match her own as often as possible. On a side note, Newborn size baby clothes fit American Girl Dolls pretty well. I thought it was really cool that one of the outfits that Isabella wears was really SJ’s from when she was a baby!

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There have been many special memories made in the days and nights that SJ has owned this very special doll. 

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This whole post is basically an excuse to share a few of the photos of the doll from the past year.

 

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The dolls are considered appropriate for ages 8 and up. SJ got Isabella on her 7th birthday and I’m glad we went for it. Hopefully this means there will be many more years of playtime ahead.

By | April 6th, 2018|Uncategorized|0 Comments

Year One

It’s been a year since we moved into our little ol’ house in the Cincinnati suburbs. I thought it would be fun to go through my phone photos and highlight some of the little things I have come to love about the home that we ended up in. You may notice that I only talk about the outdoors! There are things we love about the inside too, but it’s definitely a work in progress. I’ll save that for another post.

 

First off, there is someone on this cozy street who has been there to greet us since day one and we have been so blessed to have him in our lives. His name is Walter.

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He even made an appearance in this photo that we have with our realtor. Proof that he was with us since the beginning.

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He was actually a puppy when we met him, so I guess he is about a year and a half old now. His family lives directly across the street from us, but they don’t have any little kiddos so I think Walter enjoys being around a gang that is as rambunctious as he is! And since we don’t have a dog nor do we plan to get one anytime soon he fills that void for our family.

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The first Holiday we celebrated in our new home was Easter. We were able to host lunch for 18 people! I cut fresh lilacs from our tree out front, we hid eggs in the yard, and Mémé and Pépé brought kites and other goodies for all 8 grandchildren. It was the picture perfect day.

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Next up we got to know some of our neighbors. Most of these houses have been around for close to 50 years and a lot of the residents have lived here the whole time so we are one of the youngest families. Not entirely though, there are several boys that are Z’s age.

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This has been so cool for my little man who had to leave all of his friends and his school (although thankfully they are still not far). I love that he has friends to hang out with. If the weather is nice I guarantee you our doorbell will ring at least once a day. They play sports, hike, swim, shoot nerf guns, and get plenty of fresh air and exercise.

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We have this awesome living room window that overlooks the street and I get to spy on them! I call it my eye in the sky.

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Another thing I love as a mom of small children is that we live on a dead end street off a dead end street so there is no traffic! That means when the kids are out of school they are in the streets.
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Just pick your favorite way to roll!

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Sometimes I see this kind of mess in my driveway and it makes my little mama heart flutter! I love being a place that kids know they can come and park their bikes. It is my favorite!

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Here is another pic that really shows what our street is like.

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There are a couple different neighbors talking in the middle of the road with dogs sitting around and a kid coming down the hill on a skate board. I mean really! That’s our house in the middle of the picture in the background.  I know this isn’t a luxurious dream spot that you are going to find on TV or in a magazine, but in my book, it’s even better.

Okay now let’s talk about our yard. We’ve got some awesome trees. We wish we had more. Our neighbor behind us has a pool, a playground, a shed and a trampoline with a chain link fence. To be honest, we would love a little privacy between us and them, but I’m being nitpicky here. Those tropical looking plants are banana trees. They die in the winter and get super tall in the summer. They do not produce fruit because the warm seasons aren’t long enough here in Ohio.

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J hung a couple of swings from some of the tress and the kids love to play outside!

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In fact, this yard is what sold us on the house. The patio area is perfect for us.

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For my 35th birthday my family came out and they gave us a grill!

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So we cookout and eat outside every chance we get.

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In the summer we garden! We have loved getting plant berries and vegetables and to make the most of having a place to grow things.

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The list of gardening benefits goes on and on. It’s fun and educational for the kids. It’s therapeutic for us. It’s healthy for everybody! I hope we get to do it again this year.

 

Last but not least what I love about my house is the view. Our street name is Hillside and I love being up high on hill. We don’t have a scenic overlook and we aren’t in a completely wooded area, but it’s wooded enough that we see alot of critters. Chipmunks, woodpeckers, hawks, bullfrogs, humingbirds and deer are frequently spotted in our yard.

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I love seeing the sunrise over the hillside. It is so beautiful and after feeling like vagabonds for 5 years this house such a miracle for us. I’ll mention again, it’s not perfect, but we are blessed to be here and I refuse to take this gift for granted. I thank the Lord that he led us to this place. Everything about it is right for our family. This is where we get to raise our family. What an honor. 


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By | March 22nd, 2018|Uncategorized|0 Comments

Inspiring Mom Christen Dierken

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If you met Christen you would see a radiant wife and mother, but behind the sweet smile is a fierce woman of courage, strength, and determination.

Raised in California, Christen was one of six children. She didn’t have a picture-perfect childhood. Her biological father was murdered when she was just a baby. From an early age Christen felt that she had to be tough in order to feel a sense of control.

When she was 14 years old her bother convinced her to try wrestling. The coach at the time was opposed to the idea of a female wrestler and while she was allowed to join the team it was not well received. Christen was treated like garbage by other team members. One time they literally threw her in a dumpster. They would steal her wrestling gear and call her names.

“They hated me” Christen explained. “They tried beating me up in practice. They told me to join a girl’s sport like volleyball. Still, I ended up wrestling varsity and proved everyone wrong.”

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When Christen learned that there was a girl’s high school national competition she was intrigued. She didn’t realize that other girls were wrestling and even competing together! So she went for it and placed 5th in the nation, earning All-American status her Junior and Senior years.

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In 2007 she was recruited to the number one college for women’s wrestling, The University of the Cumberlands. She wrestled for Cumberland’s from 2007-2011. While earning her Bachelor’s degree, she won several prestigious tournaments. She was a 4 time Collegiate All-American, placing 2nd, 6th, 3rd, and 2nd.

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As a Sophomore in college, she made the Junior World Championship team and Senior National team in the same year. That was when her wrestling career ‘really took off.’ While wrestling for her University, she also won 3 National titles through USA Wrestling, winning BodyBar Junior Nationals and University Nationals. She earned a spot on three world teams (Junior Worlds, University Worlds, and Beach Worlds), and Junior and Senior Pan-American Championship teams.

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She was afforded the opportunity to travel and compete in several countries including Canada, Mexico, Germany, Morocco, Belarus, India, and Turkey. Traveling around the world doing what she loved was an amazing experience, but one of the most significant moments of that season in her life was when Christen met her husband David.

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David was a wrestler as well, and although his conservative Christian homeschool background was different from her upbringing the two of them became fast friends. They started running together to cut weight and held each other accountable to keep fit. They ended up dating for several years before tying the knot in 2011.

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At this point, Christen was at the height of her athletic career. She was ranked number 2 on the Senior National team and was consistently top three on the senior level.

However, as the 2012 Olympics were approaching, she encountered some serious injuries. Although she qualified for the Olympic Trials, she had to compete through her injuries. Unfortunately, she did not place at the Olympic trials. Unbeknownst to Christen, this was the end of her wrestling career. She took time off to recover from her injuries, but when she tried to return to competition, she had already fallen out of the rankings and was without any sponsors. Leaving wrestling this way was devastating for her.

“I went from being top three to losing both matches in Olympic trials. Even though I had a feeling in my heart that that would be my last tournament I still had a mindset that I was going to the Olympics and I was trying to force it. Training was my life! I hit a breaking point because all of a sudden I had no idea what I was going to do with my life. 

At the time I was a new Christian and I felt God was drawing me closer to Him. I would play worship music and get lost with God and allow him to heal my heart. I had taken an art class in high school and so I got out a paint set and I started painting and drawing as I spent time with God.

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That was when I went from wrestling being my idol and finding my worth being in my accomplishment and for the first time I allowed God to be my rock and not myself. I  had always felt like I was looking out for myself. I was obsessed with being great until I ended up letting go and letting God be enough for me. My accomplishments and productivity didn’t matter anymore. I discovered my love for art and I started doing art in church and people encouraged me.

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I still love doing art during worship. I always bring a sketch book to church with me. It helps me remember the message. Art has become my outlet.”

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Over the next several years David and Christen would move and work various jobs. Christen even joined the military.

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They waited four years before trying to have children and once they got to a place where they struggled with infertility for nearly two years. Eventually they decided to become foster parents . They still have a heart for foster children and adoption, but they placed all that on hold when they became pregnant in 2017!

Christen and David were elated. They knew it was not a coincidence that this pregnancy came promptly after Christen had experienced major healing and restoration from her past. This pregnancy was a miracle.

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The only thing Christen was nervous about was the thought of having a girl.

“I was terrified of having a daughter and not being able to relate. I had worked so hard in wrestling, in the military, and in the workplace to break down the barriers I faced as a woman. I had always been a tomboy and didn’t want to have a daughter. Yet, as I was praying about halfway through the pregnancy God completely changed my heart. I knew we were having a girl before the ultrasound even revealed it and God gave us the perfect name for her: Scarlette Ruth.  Scarlette to represent beauty and the blood of Jesus, and Ruth for strength.”

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Scarlette lights up their life every single day. Christen recently even made the jump to being a stay at home mom and she is a natural when it comes to motherhood. For so long Christen used her strength as a way to guard and protect herself. Now Christen has found a new kind of strength, the kind that works best in weakness and surrendering to love.

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Scarlette is still just a little baby starting to show her personality. Christen sometimes wonders what she will be like when she is older. Will she want to be in a rough sport like her mom or will she do something like ballet? Christen admits that the world of ballet would be totally foreign to her but if that is what Scarlette wanted she would support her. Although, Christen adds with a grin, “ if she is going to do ballet she is going be a beast at it”. Considering who her parents are, I am pretty sure she is going conquer anything she puts her mind too. 

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By | March 14th, 2018|Uncategorized|2 Comments

Enchanted Swing Photos

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It was a random day in May last year when I woke up to the most gorgeous scenic fog I  have ever seen. This is where being a professional photographer on the side definitely has its perks because with zero preparation I was able to do a 15 minute photo shoot that we will cherish for a lifetime. I told SJ to put on a pretty dress and meet me outside. The results were breathtaking!

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Now to put it in perspective this is a photo taken on my phone in the same spot.

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And here is one unedited uncropped, exactly how it looked on my camera.

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I love how even the neighbor’s woodpile in the back covered with a tarp looks like a boulder. I also love all the little imperfections. The flower was actually a decorative flower and when SJ and Elle had rose printed dresses one year I glued the rose to a hair clip. The bow in the back is haphazardly tied instead of picture perfect. I also love how her little bare feet have dirt on them and the swing is handmade by her dad. I know these are things that no one else would notice or realize when they see the whole picture, but they are the kind of details that I can drive me crazy if I let them. I start wishing the swing was more vintage looking and that her bow flowed more or that the flower matched her dress. It’s ridiculous. I know. Then I embrace it and like the picture even more because of how spontaneous and real it was. It’s like I am at war with my laid back authentic self and the Pinterest devil inside me.

 

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I’m really happy with the way it all turned out and I have been saving these photos for a special occasion which first off was her 8th birthday. I will probably use them for her birthday party invitations too, and graduation now and graduation in 11 years, and her wedding day! Needless to say I am a little obsessed, with both the pictures and the subject. Happy birthday little princess.

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By | March 9th, 2018|Uncategorized|0 Comments

Messy Mom’s FAVORITE Podcasts

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This recent tweet of mine is SO TRUE! I don’t get a lot of adult interaction throughout my day and so I listen to podcasts where other adults talk to each other about some of the stuff that I am into. I’ll be cleaning the toilet or folding laundry while I listen to Jen Hatmaker talk to the Chewbacca mom and I feel like they are in my room helping me fold and we are all just guffawing and talking about Chuys Mexican restaurant. Seriously. The last four episodes have been soooo good. Anyway, so I love podcasts and I switch up every few months or so, but at this current time here are my top five.

  1. For the Love with Jen Hatmaker

2857364_3036765_1519751838I pretty much already talked about this one. I don’t listen all the way through every episode depending on the guest but this last month’s series For the Love of Laughter definitely had me fangirling. The first guest was Anjelah Johnson (I saw her at a women’s conference once and have loved her ever since) and there were two online viral comedians who I didn’t know I loved but man they had so many amazing truths to share. I literally took notes! And she also interviewed my man Jon Crist who I adore. If you don’t follow him on Instagram you should. He is so funny and his instastories are the best.

2. Typology with Ian Morgan Cron

 

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I don’t know if any of you are into the Enneagram but I am trying to be. That’s what the Typology podcast is all about. I love the guests on this show. If you have ever listened to Waterdeep or read the Modern Mrs. Darcy blog at all you probably will too. One guest was Shauna Niequist who was also a guest on Jen Hatmaker’s podcast.

3. Dream Big with Eva Karpman

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I just recently discovered this little gem. The host of the show is only 8 years old, but she is so smart and fun. You will immediately fall in love with her enthusiastic personality. The show is for kids of all ages (including grown ups who are kids at heart). The features Eva, her mom, and amazing guests that inspire kids to reach their dreams. One of my favorite episodes is an interview with Haben Girma, the first deafblind graduate from Harvard Law school. Oh my gosh she is incredible. I also learned a lot in the Whole 30 episode with Melissa Hartwig who by the way was also on Jen Hatmaker’s podcast!

4. Building a StoryBrand with Donald Miller

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This podcast gives advice to business owners and content creators (like bloggers) to help them clarify their message. I don’t listen to all of them, but there are a lot of guests that I really enjoy and I have learned a lot from this podcasts. One of my favorite episodes was an interview with Auntie Anne Beiler (who started Auntie Anne’s pretzels). Her story was phenomenal! Who knew she used to be Amish!? And because I am tying everyone to Jen Hatmaker I can’t go without mentioning that Donald Miller interviewed Rachel Hollis who was also on, you guessed it, the For the Love Podcast. The cool thing is when Jen Hatmaker interviewed her I get to hear about her testimony and it’s awesome. When Donald Miller interviewed her it was all about the nitty gritty of her career as a writer and I got so much out of it!

5. How I Built This

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I saved the best for last. I am probably the all-time biggest How I Built This fan. It’s an NPR podcast hosted by the one and only Guy Raz. Each week features different “innovators, entrepreneurs, and idealists” who share how they became successful. It’s usually a rags to riches story. A lot of the Shark Tank investors have been on the show. I am an entrepreneur to the core and I am a sucker for true stories that inspire. This show is my jam. One of my favorite episodes was an interview with celebrity chef Jose Andres from Barcelona who brought the small plate movement to the US. I will always remember the part of the story where he shared about his upbringing in Spain and having cooking traditional spanish pies for friends and family. Andrés said

“He would never let me cook. My father would always put me in charge of making the fire. He would send me into the forest to pick out the wood. And one day I got upset and I said ‘Daddy I want to cook’ and he said ‘No I need you in charge of the fire. It is very important’  I was so upset with him that he sent me away and when the pie was finished and he fed everybody, he took me aside and told me ‘my son I thought that you understood. I gave you the most important task. Cooking itself is easy if somebody is controling the fire. You want to be a great cook, be in charge of the fire then you will be able to cook whatever you want in life”

When I heard this guy who is now a world-renowned celebrity chef tell this story (with his heavy Spanish accent for the record) I was just blown away. I say this one was my favorite but I have a lot of favorites. The couple that made the Chipmunks, Melissa and Doug, the Chuck E Cheese story, BET network of all things. There are so many great stories. I don’t have any guest that were on Jen Hatmaker’s blog. Not yet anyway.

So those are my top 5 for now. I am always looking for more to listen to though so please share your favorites with me!

 

By | March 2nd, 2018|Uncategorized|1 Comment

Inspiring Mom Lora Kendrick

For most expectant moms the 20 weeks ultrasound is where they find out the baby’s gender. That’s all that Lora Kendrick had on her mind when she and her husband Morgan had their ultrasound with their second child. It never even crossed their mind that anything would be abnormal. As the tech did the exam everything seemed fine but Lora says “When the doctor walked in the door and I saw the way she looked at me my heart dropped. I will never forget it. I knew right then that something was wrong. My whole body felt it before she said a word”.

That’s when they learned that only half of their daughter’s heart was developing. There were other complications too. At the time they were referred to a prenatal specialist and they were given no guarantee that their daughter would make it to term.

The rest of the pregnancy was uneventful. There were lots of ultrasounds and testing. They determined that there weren’t any chromosomal abnormalities so all they were left to do was wait and see.

Baby Mya was born in March of 2010. She had surgery when she was a week old which they were prepared for. What they were not prepared for was that she almost lost her life on the operating table. Mya was put on life support and immediately added to the list for a heart transplant. When they were allowed to go back to Mya’s room they were overwhelmed by what they saw. It was actually two hospital rooms connected that were both full of machines and in the middle of it was a tiny 6 pound baby that those machines were working to keep alive. Lora describes it as an out of body experience. They were given pagers and told to keep the pager and their phones nearby at all times in case there was news of a heart because if a heart came in they would need to act quickly.

They struggled to keep their heads above water in the midst of this devastating turn of events. Thankfully they were surrounded by friends and family that were there to pray with them, cry with them and help with their 3 year old son. It had been over a month of waiting and Mya’s health was taking a turn for the worse. No one knew exactly how long she could live without the heart transplant, but something needed to happen soon! Her liver and kidneys were struggling. She looked very yellow. Lora was pumping milk to give her via a dropper into her feeding tube but Mya’s stomach was no longer able take in the milk and she would instantly vomit it up. They would later discover that she lost her hearing too.

Everyone knew time was short. It had been 8 weeks since Mya’s birth and one night they were back at home with their 3 year old getting ready for bed and Lora looked at her husband Morgan and said “If we get a call don’t get too excited because they might be calling to say that she is getting sicker and that we need to come in.” The phone rang at 2:00 am and it was Karen, their transplant coordinator. Morgan answered and said, “Karen, Please tell me this is a good phone call”. Lora looked at him with anticipation. They both held their breath and the response on the other end of the line was “I only make the good phone calls. We have a heart. We’ll go into surgery by 7:00 am so get down here.”

Lora was shaking as she jumped out of bed and immediately called her sister to come down to watch her son. She started texting and calling everyone in the middle of the night. It’s been 8 years since that life-altering moment but Lora remembers every detail and as she recounts them all, tears of joy flow down her face. Everyone was celebrating and giving praise to God. When they arrived at the hospital all the nurses were there outside of Mya’s room to greet them and hug them. But Lora pauses before she explains “It was the most bizarre feeling because it was the best day of our lives. Our baby was about to die and all of the sudden with this one phone call now she is going to live and this other family is at the absolute worst moment of their entire lives. They will never have a moment worse than that because it was their child and the heart had to belong to a child younger than 12 months old. I felt like my emotions were going in every direction possible. I hate to even go through thoughts like this, but then I think, well that family had to go through it so I can a least take a minute to think about what had to happen. To let my mind consider what they were feeling and to honor their loss.”

The Kendricks have written letters to the donor’s family to express their gratitude and give reports about how well Mya is doing. They do not have any information on the family and the family does not have information on them. All communication is sent through an agency. The Kendricks receive confirmation about whether or not the letter is accepted and that is the extent of it.  Because of the sensitive nature of being an organ donor things can get complicated, especially if someone were to feel like they had some ownership of an organ recipient. So the whole exchange is done in a professional, formal manner.

Even though the heart transplant for Mya was a success the entire process is a long road and it is not a permanent solution.

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The first time Mya was ever outside of the hospital was when she was 9 months old. When she came home she was hooked to a trach, a feeding tube, a PICC line, a ventilator and more. Lora describes that time as physically and emotionally exhausting.

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Thankfully Mya lives a pretty typical life now. She does have regular checkups to make sure her heart and body are still healthy and within the next 20 years she will need a new heart. She is a little warrior though. She has had to work twice as hard as anyone to eat real food, take her first steps, say her first words and do all the things we take for granted. She is victorious though. Little Mya approaches each hurdle with a smile on her face and in turn brings smiles to the faces of everyone around her.

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It might seem contradictory to describe her as a warrior and a little ray of sunshine but if you know Mya you will see that she is 100% both. She is about to be 8 years old and this spring Mya will graduate from her deaf school and finally be able to attend elementary school at her local school district. It’s a very exciting year for their family.

Looking back at the journey Lora knows that she could have never done this alone. In the middle of those days that were just a blur of emotions and motions going back and forth up and down, she knows God gave her the grace and the peace that she needed to get through it. She also shares how her husband became her survival partner. Even though marriage seemed like something that they couldn’t give any focus to in the midst of the craziness, they chose to make their relationship a priority and it’s why they have made it this far. Lora also gives credit to family. Their family was there to take care of their son while they were in the hospital or to stay with Mya in the hospital when they couldn’t. Family (and friends that are like family) were the glue that held everything together when it could have so easily fallen apart.

To this day the Kendricks value their faith, their marriage, their family and friends more than anything else in this world. It was a tough learning experience for sure, but one that has taught them more in 8 years than most people will ever figure out in 80 years. They are stronger and closer than ever and no matter what comes their way they are ready to face it together.img_4434




*** If you would like to be an organ donor be sure to talk to your spouse and loved ones. Even if it is on your driver’s license your closest family member will need to say yes. It is a difficult conversation to have but Lora encourages families to think about it and consider testimonies of families like the Kendricks who have been impacted by this gift of life.***

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By | February 20th, 2018|Uncategorized|0 Comments

How Asher and Addie Met

 

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It all started with a haircut. Well kind of.

Asher and Addie were both going to the same church and had many mutual friends but there wasn’t a connection until Asher went to get a haircut from this budding stylist he had heard so much about. She was practicing her skills to lead up to fulltime work at a salon and Asher did not mind giving Addie as much practice as she needed. At that time in their relationship, they were just friends.  “We were friends that spent time talking about random stuff like cheeseburgers and it just naturally progressed from there. We went from being friends to good friends to best friends” as Asher describes it.

Then Addie recounts the encounter where it all changed. She says “Asher met with me one day and said ‘I want you to hear this from me and not my friends’ and I was so nervous because I thought he wanted to tell me some bad news like that he didn’t see me that way. But then he said ‘I am interested in you and I have been for a while’. I was excited and I felt like my cheeks were up in my eyeballs, but all I could say was ‘oh’ and Asher said ‘You don’t have to say anything right now.”

That moment led to their first date which played out like a story book. It was a gorgeous fall day in Cincinnati and Asher took Addie to the Bow Tie cafe where they talked for hours until the coffee shop closed and they had to leave. As they were leaving the shop employee was sweeping up and said “Have a good night; It looks like you already are.” then they walked out to a scenic overlook and fireworks literally went off. They have no idea why there were fireworks that night in November but it made a perfect evening even more spectacular. From there Asher asked Addie what she was doing the next Tuesday night. When she said she was available he immediately followed with “and what about the Tuesday after that?” A giddy Addie rushed over to her friends house afterwards to talk about “the best date ever”.

The relationship continued to grow from there.

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This was all new territory for Addie who had unfortunately had some bad boyfriends in the past. She wasn’t used to a guy who valued her like Asher did and reminded her on a regular basis that she was God’s masterpiece. Asher was everything she had wanted in a husband. In fact, she found an actual list that God had prompted her to write two years before she started dating Asher. It was in a season of prayer in fasting that she felt the Lord leading her to make a list and include everything that HE would have in a man for Addie. As she looked over the list she realized that every single detail lined up with her boyfriend Asher! She knew that he was the one that she would spend the rest of her life with.

Asher didn’t have a tangible list, but he did have a defining moment. He knew this was the woman he would marry when they were on one of their regular dates just sitting in the car and he looked at her gorgeous smile and said: “Wait. Are we in love?”.

There were many more dates from there. One was a picnic in a gazebo at a park. Asher knew then and there that this was the place he would someday propose to Addie. So on February 18, 2017 he did just that. She thought they were going to a birthday party but a slight detour along the way led them to the gazebo with lights, a blanket, a framed picture, rose petals and some romantic Indian music. That is when Asher got down on one knee and they began the journey to become husband and wife.

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The wedding ceremony was December 23, but first they had the pre wedding celebration called a Mendhi. Asher’s family is originally from Pakistan where it is a custom to have a big celebration with a lot of food and dancing and Indian music in the days leading up to the ceremony.

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This is where they wore the traditional clothing. Asher and Addie practiced for a long time for this moment where they presented a special dance before all of their family and friends.

Asher’s family loved Addie and commended her for fitting right in. She is originally from a small town in Kentucky, but you would never know by how well she fully embraced the Pakistani culture.

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The next day their pastor officiated the ceremony where they joined in an everlasting covenant to became one and everyone celebrated what it was so clearly a divine match orchestrated by God.

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Asher and Addie truly have a heart to reach the next generation and make an impact for Christ. Their love for God and passion for His people radiates in all that they do. They hope to start a family someday and raise them up to be Kingdom minded. This is just the beginning for the Mian family, but as Philippians 1:6 says “I am confident of this very thing, that He who has begun a good work in you will complete it until the day of Jesus Christ.”

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Asher + Addie from Cody Brown on Vimeo.

 

For more real life love stories check out the rest of the How We Met series here on MessyMom.com.

By | February 15th, 2018|Uncategorized|1 Comment