Natalie, Author at Messymom

About Natalie

I am a Jesus Lover, a wife, and a mother. And I'm making the best of what looks like a mess!

My Personal Hearing Loss Story

This might be a bit of a bore, but I just got hearing aids and there are a lot of people shocked to learn that I have hearing loss. Shoot, even I am a little surprised in some ways. So here is the story start to finish.

When I was a little girl my parents took me in for a hearing test because it didn’t seem like I was responding as well as I should. At the time I was diagnosed with stubborn toddler syndrome. In other words there was no sign of hearing loss.

I never struggled in school or carrying on a conversation so the idea of hearing loss didn’t come up again. In high school I realized that I couldn’t hear really high pitches that my friends could hear, but that’s not a big deal.

When I was 20 (2002) I had a bad episode of vertigo and experienced ringing and stuffiness in my left ear.

I expected it to subside, but when it didn’t I found an ENT and had a hearing test done. Their report showed mild hearing loss, but I was told there was no remedy and to just play music to distract me from the ringing. It was such a discouraging consultation considering I had no insurance at the time and shelled out $350 for the exam. I just wanted some answers. I wanted help.

Fast forward about 10 years (2012) and my daughter SJ was diagnosed deaf.

Her hearing loss is genetic, but we were told that J and I are both carriers of the genetic mutation. So it’s recessive. We have no history of deafness in our families.

In the mean time my hearing seemed worse, but I put my needs on the back burner. I thought maybe I was imagining it because there was so much focus on hearing loss in our home. I was always misunderstanding people or not hearing them at all. One day my sister in law asked if I ever considered getting hearing aids. I dismissed it because compared to SJ I was hearing just fine. I was in denial.

However three years later (in early 2015) I bit the bullet and decided I would have another hearing test done. I went to a GP who referred me to an audiologist. The audiologist tested me in a sound booth and the results showed that I had moderate to severe hearing loss on the left and mild on the right. I had so many questions for the audiologist, but she had no answers. She said that I needed to see a different doctor. They told me they would call me and they never did. I could have followed up and been more assertive, but I had three children plus one on the way and again I put my needs on the back burner.

After Elle was born she failed the newborn hearing screening. I swore she could hear because she flinched and startled to noise. Yet she failed the screening over and over again. Sadly, I knew this meant she would eventually be deaf like her sister. HOWEVER, the genetic test (which takes about 6 weeks for results by the way) showed that her hearing loss is different than SJ! Her hearing loss is still genetic, but it’s generally a mild hearing loss. None of us saw that coming. The geneticist said the only way this is even possible is if either the mother or father also have this hearing loss. I voluntarily suggested that it was me. Basically between SJ’s DNA and Elle’s DNA they uncovered the missing link to my hearing loss mystery. So they ordered a genetic test for me just to be sure. I got it back a couple weeks ago and it confirmed that I do in fact have hearing loss due to genetic mutation (I know that sounds weird). I asked about why it didn’t show up as a real problem until later in life and so far no one has an answer for that.

Regardless, now that I had it in writing with DNA evidence I was ready to do something about it. I went back to the same doctor, and was sent to another doctor, and then to the audiologist and was tested AGAIN and FINALLY got my hearing aids. So even though it looks like this diagnosis and treatment came from out of nowhere it’s kind of been leading up to this point for a long time.

So that’s the back story. I have a daughter who is deaf, a daughter who has mild hearing loss, and between the two of them I finally recognized that I have moderate hearing loss.

Of course everyone wants to know if it’s related to gender at all, but it’s not. That part is completely coincidental.

I am still getting used to the devices, but I do feel like I can hear a lot better with them. That does not mean that I hear perfectly though, so please be patient with me if I am not understanding or if I have to ask you to repeat yourself. Thankfully I have been reminded by several professionals that no one hears perfectly so I don’t need to feel bad.

This whole hearing loss journey has been a wild ride, but I at least we’re getting somewhere.

By Natalie|2023-06-12T06:19:00+00:00July 1, 2016|Hearing Aids, Hearing Loss|3 Comments

Messy Mom Math Problem

If you are not following Messy Mom on Facebook then you haven’t seen my latest fascination with creating my own memes.

Like this one

Or this hilarious shot of baby Elle’s face

Or lastly, another funny baby Elle expression.

Today’s Messy Mom original meme is kind of like a common core math problem and yes those are just a fraction (excuse the pun) of my family of six’s mix-matched socks.

I am going to get back to sorting, but I have an audiology appointment later this week. I’ll be sure to give an update on my hearing aids!

By Natalie|2016-06-28T17:07:43+00:00June 28, 2016|Laughter|1 Comment

Store Membership Rant

I know I will be dating myself with this complaint, but remember when you could go into a store and buy your groceries by simply exchanging money for goods? There was no harassment from cashiers or cash registers asking you a gazillion questions at check out? It was as simple as That will be $29.37 will you be paying with cash or check? Done.

Not anymore. Not even close.

Let’s say I’m at my local drug store buying some chapstick and gum really quick and I am asked for my rewards card. I say I don’t have one, but then of course there is the speil about how I could sign up for one and it wouldn’t take long, and I would save so much. Blah blah blah. I politely say no and continue on with my purchase. The next question is debit or credit. I say debit, then swipe my card and enter my pin. Done. Just kidding.

First I get asked if I want to donate a dollar to some worthy cause. I say no and feel like a terrible person. Then the machine asks if I want cash back. I say no. If I am at a gas station it will ask if I want or a car wash or a snack. NO. NO. NO. The answer is no. I just want my chapstick and gum and I want to get out of here. Except for in my haste I accidentally selected “No” when it asked me if this the amount was correct. Crap. Now I have to start all over.

Here’s the thing about all the membership card stuff, they will brain wash you into joining their cult. I held out for a long time, but eventually I realized that it wasn’t going away so I succumbed to having an outrageous amount of plastic keychain cards on my key ring because despite the hassle it really did save me a bunch of money. At first I was really frustrated about having to get a stupid membership for every store I stepped foot in even if it’s a store that I only go to once a year, because if I am not a member I might pay $3.89 instead of $2.59 and I don’t know if I could live with myself if I let that deal slip by! Over time I was suckered into signing up for every single rewards program, advantage card, extra care ID, loyalty plus, or pharmacy covenant card out there. I finally stopped complaining and decided it wasn’t so bad. In fact I forgot that it ever really bothered me. That’s when it happened.

I call it Attack of the Apps.

That’s right friends, it’s not enough to have a rewards card. Now you have to have an app for every store you step foot in. I don’t have room on my phone for another stinking app! Maybe if I delete a couple hundred selfies that my toddler took, but I don’t have time to do that at the moment and therefor I have to pay $4.27 instead of $3.39! Or I have to wait in line at Starbucks or Chic-fil-A with other low life people that don’t have the app. Gah!!! Why can’t a store just have a sale, take my money, and be done with it.

Except, I am a blogger and I know why they can’t do that. It’s because they want your commitment and they want your information so that they can continue to ~~harass you~~ offer you awesome deals. That is why I have experts telling me that if I don’t have a pop up ad asking for your email I must not really care about blogging and if I don’t have said pop up ad I should expect to never have a real fanbase. I have never followed through with this advice and probably will never have a substantial fanbase because of it, but whatever.

Eventually, I will probably get all the apps. I will have the apps and the cards and a pop up subscription. Then they will probably want me to get a microchip implanted in my wrist, but that is where I will definitely draw the line.
I don’t care how much I save on shampoo. So there.

By Natalie|2016-06-21T15:25:41+00:00June 21, 2016|Laughter|0 Comments

The First Day With a Hearing Aid

Yesterday was my first day with my new hearing aid. As with most physical therapy treatments you have to press through a lot of challenges in order to get your body to respond in the way it is supposed to.

So it’s been a rough 24 hours (minus when I slept). I knew there was skill involved in learning to listen with a hearing device because of having a daughter with a cochlear implant, but I assumed since I can hear and was born hearing that I would be exempt from such a difficult transition stage. I was wrong.

It is way more challenging than I ever imagined. When I put the device on yesterday it sounded like the world was on “speaker phone” mode and I don’t know if you have ever had your voice echo when someone else has you on their speaker phone, but it’s annoying and that’s how it was at first. Luckily, the initial reverb didn’t last too long. However everything still sounds like I am in a cave or something. It’s not natural. Have you ever talked while plugging your ears? If not, go ahead and try it. Do you hear your voice muffled inside your head? That’s what my voice sounds like all the time to me right now. I feel like I should be whispering because the sound of my voice is so loud. Some things sound close to normal, but there are thousands of small sounds that appear to be amplified. This is what happens when you go without typical hearing for a while (or have never had it). Your ears interpret all sound the same. It’s all coming at you equally and your brain gradually decides what is needed and what to filter out.

One example I can think of experiencing this phenomenon was when we moved into our first home which was a few miles from a railroad track. I will never forget that first night while our mattress was still laying on the floor of a room full of unpacked boxes. I thought the train sounded like it was running through our house and rattling my brains. It was SO loud. Oh no. What have we done? I thought. I wasn’t sure how we would ever sleep with the train and it’s notorious whistle so close by. However, the sensation didn’t last. I am not sure how long it took, I just know that despite the trains schedule and location remaining the same I no longer heard it. My brain filtered it out. That’s what is supposed to happen with hearing aids. I even asked my daughter’s audiologist for second opinion. Are you sure it’s not being amplified louder than it should be? I shouldn’t be able to hear the toilet paper slide off the roll. She assured me that my case was no different than the others and I just had to push through and allow my brain to file away that distracting background noise.

It can be debilitating though. This is what it is like running a simple errand.

When you walk to the car you hear footsteps on the pavement and the grass. You hear wind (the way it sounds on a phone or home movie, very loud and distorted). You can hear your keys jingling and cars driving by.

As you get in the car you hear the door unlock, unlatch, and the seatbelt slides and clicks into place. You hear the engine start, the AC starts, there is lots of beeping and clicking with putting the car into gear or using the turning signal. And if you are thinking that you already hear all of those things, you are right. But do you always notice them? Do they distract you? Would you consider them loud and intrusive?

As you drive you have some coins in your console that keep sliding back and forth with every turn and slope. You grab a bottle of water and the plastic crumples and sounds ear piercing. You hear the cap unscrew, you hear the water go down your throat, then you hear yourself put the cap back on and return the water to the cup holder.

When you arrive at the store you hear the music which sounds normal, but the hangers on the rack sound extremely loud, a child is playing with a toy in the distance and you hear that. You feel like everyone that is talking is close by, but they are not. When you pay you hear yourself get out your wallet and all the items inside your purse starts banging up against each other like some kind of violent mosh pit. You hear yourself open the wallet, and I kid you not, you hear the debit card slide out of the wallet. You hear the beeping of the cash register as you normally would, but the magnitude of the stapler that the employee uses sounds like she must have used an industrial strength nail gun to combine two receipts. You flinch and hear yourself clasp your purse and grab the plastic bag which never stops crumpling loudly up against your leg.

Are you tired yet? I am. It sounds like I must be exaggerating, but everything I have read and all the professionals I have spoken with tell me this is just how it goes at first. This article form Starkey.com was really helpful and explains everything so realistically. They say “the learning curve can take anywhere from six weeks to six months. Success comes from practice and commitment.” So I am going to keep at it. Many of the articles I have read describe the adjustment time as tiring and disorenting which are the exact words I have used.

I go back in 2 weeks to see my audiologist and see how I am coming along. It may not be perfect by then, but it should be much easier. I hope. Feel free to ask me any questions. I have said so much, and yet there is so much I haven’t covered. Thanks for the prayers and encouragement.

By Natalie|2023-06-12T06:19:14+00:00June 15, 2016|Hearing Aids, Uncategorized|2 Comments

American Eagle Gets it Right… Almost

***Edited*** I would consider this a family friendly blog. And I like to think that my readers could have young children looking over their shoulders without having to worry about seeing a close up of some gal’s rear end in a bikini. So I have edited this post to include this disclaimer just in case anyone would like a heads up. I never post graphic content, but due to the nature of this post there are a few photos of some scantily clad women. So there’s that. ****

It’s swimsuit season! Yay!!! *excuse my sarcasm* So I was checking out suits online at Aerie (American Eagle lingerie and apparel) and this model caught my eye today.

I’ve never known American Eagle to feature plus size girls, but this swimsuit model looks a tiny bit closer to what the average woman’s body looks like. I know this shouldn’t be that big of a deal, but I have seen a lot swimsuit ads over the years and rarely do I see a woman that has any curves except sometimes in the chest, which is the opposite of what I see at the beach. I wanted to give a standing ovation for diversity. Way to go American Eagle for showing how there are gorgeous models that aren’t a size zero.

Except, the way it works on this particular website is when you hold the cursor over an image it shows the back of the garment. I am scrolling through the online catalogue and I see the front side of the model and the back. Front. Back. Front. Back. There are dozens of swimsuits. Then I stop at one image in particular because I see the front and then where did she go?

Um. Either that’s a different girl, or they photoshopped the crap out of her. In their defense they did have a shot of her back on a different swimsuit.

I hate to be picky, but this was the only model whose size drastically changed from one photo to another. Why? Maybe it was an honest mistake and all the photos of her in that swimsuit from the back were underexposed or something? I doubt it.

On the one hand I am happy to see a model that isn’t rail thin. On the other hand why is she represented so differently than all the other models? It makes me sad. It’s like they want to encourage women of different body types, but they are only willing to go so far.

I’m too old for American Eagle’s target demographic anyway, but on behalf of girls of all sizes thanks for featuring a curvy model. I think we would all like to see even more of that. Now how about taking it a step further and having her model the front AND back of the swimsuit?

By Natalie|2016-06-13T17:31:16+00:00June 13, 2016|Uncategorized|2 Comments

It’s common to loose hair after pregnancy and I am not exempt from this hormonal misfortune.

When I am in those first postpartum months I shed more hair than a Chow on a hot day. I can’t stand it. I decided after my second pregnancy that I would just cut my hair off to make it more tolerable. So that’s what I have done with each baby since then.

I am normally sporting a lengthy mane through pregnancy, but then I have it all chopped off by the time my newborn has cracked their first smile. This method has worked well for me.

So after Elle came I went short with bangs, which was a new look I have never tried before.

I said I wanted the Taylor Swift bob, and the second stylist I went to really nailed it.

Friends and strangers alike were lavishing me with compliments. One woman at church froze in her tracks, grabbed me, and sternly told me to never change my new hair style. It was the most threatening compliment I’ve ever received. Between that and all the people talking about how much younger I look I feel pressure to keep this style. Now hear me out. I like the style, but there are some things I don’t like.

I have naturally wavy hair and in order to maintain the right look for this bob I have to wash, blow dry, and straighten my hair every single day. I don’t though, which means most of the time I look like Dora the Explorer without conditioner.

I can’t let it air dry. I can’t just pull it back into a pony tail. I can’t sleep on it and get up and go. This is really annoying because I am a no fuss kind of gal. I don’t mind getting gussied up every now and then, but for the day to day I like a low maintenance cut. Still, I had committed to trying this for a year. So that means I am half way there.

It’s funny how most of my friends commit to growing their hair out, but then cave. I have the opposite problem. Long hair is my fall back. One day while hiking and getting all sweaty my hair started curling up and my husband mentioned how much he loved and missed seeing my wavy hair.

AH HAH! I exclaimed, pointing at him with an accusing finger as if he had just been convicted of a crime. I knew it! You like my hair long. You haven’t said anything, but I could tell!

He is very sweet and gracious. He says he likes it either way and just wants me to like it. Fast forward a few days later when I was getting ready and complaining about my hair for the umpteenth time and he talked about how he doesn’t like his hair either. He said he wants to grow his hair out, but that’s not really an option (he’s going bald and recently shaved his head). That’s when it occurred to me that I can grow my hair out. The only thing stopping me is the pressure I put on myself. So I am going to cancel my next hair appointment and just let it grow, let it grow. I can’t hold it back anymore…

Go figure. I finally updated my blog profile picture and now I plan to change my look. At this moment it is current though. I’ll give myself a pat on the back for that.

By Natalie|2016-06-10T15:02:57+00:00June 10, 2016|Pregnancy & Birth, Uncategorized|0 Comments

Look Back and Laugh 005 {Quirky bag boy}

Last Friday I shared this photo and update on the Messy Mom Facebook page.

Great news! I always grocery shop on Friday nights (it’s a glamorous life). Tonight J is busy and we needed groceries. I am proud to say I went grocery shopping with all four kids and I didn’t loose any children or steal any products (that I know of, I probably should have given the kids a pat down). We may have come home with a little more junk food than usual, but all in all it was a success!

By the way I usually use reusable bags and prefer it because they hold more…

Talking about the reusable bags reminded me of a recent look back and laugh with a quirky outspoken bag boy.

I usually get as many freebie bags as I can. Most of them aren’t cutesy, but who cares. I rarely pay attention to what’s on the front. Not so for my bag boy on this particular day. He had an ongoing commentary for every bag that he filled.

employee: Oh Minnie Mouse! Did you go to Disney world?

me: Uh, no that was a bag my daughter got a present in for Christmas last year.

employee: I see you have a Meijer’s bag. That’s our competitor. Their prices are not as low I can tell you that.

employee: Is this your Doctor? Grabs a pink bag that has “Women’s health specialists” with Doctors names on it

me: Um, yeah (it was technically an ObGyn thank you very much. I never had anyone ask about it before, but at this point I am starting to feel self conscious).

He truly did go on and on until the bags were full and loaded into the cart. I quickly paid and he asked if I needed help getting them to the car. I declined. I felt like he already knew too much about me just by examining my reusable bags who knows what a trip to the car would entail.

In all seriousness though, he gave me a good laugh as I thought about it on the way home. He was an interesting character, but he was friendly. We need more friendly people in the world so more power to him.

By Natalie|2016-06-08T13:30:30+00:00June 8, 2016|Laughter|1 Comment

New Server!!!

Whew. It’s been a crazy month you guys. I’ve been blogging since 2008 and the longest I have ever gone without blogging is one week. One week! This whole time! So the fact that my site has been down for a month has been really discouraging. I feel like I need to skip sleeping for the unforeseeable future in order to get caught up on here. But don’t worry I am going to sleep. There are few things I love more than blogging. God for sure. Family is definitely one of them and sleep is probably the other.

If you follow Messy Mom on Facebook (which I highly recommend) then you know most of this already, but my site was crashing nonstop and J eventually decided we had to start all over. We moved the whole site to a new server. Things may look the same, but this a completely new virtual property that we just broke ground on.

A couple updates.

First of all, even though I am back to blogging we are not finished tweaking the site. So you may see some changes popping up here and there. Things like my About Me page which is sorely outdated and working out some final kinks.

I also plan to start a new series called “Inspiring Moms”. It’s going to be a once a month feature of different moms that have unique stories to tell. Please let me know if you are interested in being featured.

I want to shed light on all different stories of motherhood so maybe you have been through a divorce, or maybe you have a special needs child and you could share about that. It could be about parenting in another country or homeschool. I really want this to be something that we can learn from each other and build community. So that’s the vision behind Inspiring Moms, it’s not about the heroic mother that rescued her baby from a pack of wolves it’s about all mothers. And by the way it’s an interview so you don’t have to be a writer to participate.

Speaking of sharing stories. The Messy Mom (that’s me) is going to be doing a public speaking appearance at a bar in Cincinnati! Ack!? Can you believe it? It’s scheduled for the beginning of August and I will be sharing a humorous version of Elle’s birth story. I really look forward to what I consider a ministry opportunity. It’s going to be recorded too so if it works out I will share the video on here.

On a more personal note here is a micro-update of what is happening at home.

J is still doing a co-op at the same job. Even though he hasn’t taken classes since last year he technically graduates this August. This means we are going to rock this little rental property for at least one more year. It’s not my dream home, but it is a dream compared to the apartment.

My latest news is that I have been fitted for a hearing aid and will be getting it in one week. Most of you are probably really confused by this, I’ll explain it all when everything is finalized.

Z recently graduated 2nd grade and completed his final year in the building he has gone to since Kindergarten.

They tore the old building down immediately after school ended and now there is just a bunch of rubble that needs to be moved out of the way to give access to the new building that the students will go to in the fall.

SJ graduated Kindergarten and is currently in summer school. Some of you from Facebook were praying that she would qualify for funding and miraculously she did. So thank you all for the prayers.

Not much is new with Ezie. I think he is enjoying having the siblings around more now that school is out.

Elle is about to turn 7 months!

She is eating, sitting, and partially crawling!!! She just got her second tooth on Saturday. Oh my goodness she has changed so much. Cuter than ever though.

I think that’s pretty gets us pretty close to caught up. I will go ahead and sign off for now, but the good news is just like the Terminator “I’ll be back”.

By Natalie|2016-06-07T11:36:39+00:00June 7, 2016|Uncategorized|0 Comments

Look Back and Laugh 004 {throwing up over a cliff}
Gallery
Look Back and Laugh 004 {throwing up over a cliff}

Laughter

Look Back and Laugh 004 {throwing up over a cliff}

In 2005 I went on a missions trip to Acapulco Mexico to partner with some of our church’s missionaries that head up an orphanage there.

We kept busy the entire time with various projects, but one evening we had the opportunity to go to watch some cliff divers. These incredible athletes would climb up 100 feet onto a tiny ledge and then plunge into the Pacific Ocean with style and finesse.

I really wanted to see the performance, but I didn’t feel all that great at the time. Yet I talked myself into going. We had been working so hard and this was our chance to see some of the sites the locals had been raving about.

The place was packed with hundreds of tourist all gathered around hoping to catch a glimpse of the acrobatic stunts. However, just before the show began my stomach started doing some acrobatic stunts of it’s own. I felt really queasy and despite doing everything I could to resist the urge to vomit, my body began to launch projectile chunks over the edge of the rocks. I distinctly remember looking over at the strangers beside me and muttering “I’m sick”. I guess I thought I needed to explain myself? But there was no way out and the show must go on and so did I.

On the way back down the rocky hillside I continued to make “deposits” every few steps. My biggest fear in that moment was that it would start coming out the other end if ya know what I mean. I expressed this concern to my husband and his response was “it’s okay, we will still love you.”

Luckily that didn’t happen (at least not until I reached a bathroom.) I did however have a lot of tourist accuse me of having too much tequila. In the end our whole team came down with montezuma’s revenge because we had tostadas with lettuce that was rinsed in local water. That’s all it took to knock us out.

It’s been 11 years since that trip and I still can’t eat Tostados to this day. Despite all that it was still a really successful trip. One that I will never forget and neither will the strangers next to me on the cliff that night.

By Natalie|2016-05-02T22:25:14+00:00May 3, 2016|Laughter|1 Comment

Baby Elle 5 Months

Here we are on the tippy tail end of Aril and Elle is closer to 6 months than she is to 5, but I haven’t posted an update yet.

At 5 months she weighed 17 pounds. She is in the top 25th percentile for weight. Maybe that’s why she isn’t very mobile yet.

The day she turned 5 months (April 10th) it snowed, which is crazy, but as soon as the weather cleared up a little I took her outside. I wanted to get a picture of her in some winter clothes that she wouldn’t be able to fit in next year.

Unfortunately Elle was captivated by all the sights, textures, and sounds of the outdoors and she didn’t give me and my camera the slightest glance. I eventually gave up. The perk of being a photographer is that when she woke up from her nap with a big smile on her face I grabbed the camera again and started shooting.

She rolls over now. Mostly back to tummy and she can push herself up a lot more than what you see her doing in this photo.

She still has blue eyes although I can already see some pigment coming in. The jury is still out on whether they will be brown or green though.

Elle continues to do well in occupational therapy and speech therapy. She is also still exclusively breast fed and obviously not missing any meals (I hear that comment a lot). So everything is going great with baby Elle. She could not be loved anymore than we all love her, that’s for sure. She is precious and I am beyond blessed to be her mom.

By Natalie|2023-06-12T06:34:08+00:00April 29, 2016|My Life, Speech Therapy|1 Comment

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