Awaiting the ABR… Again

Elle is now 5 weeks old. She had her one month check up this week and is now 10 pounds 22 inches. The Doctor has been extremely impressed by her growth. Here is a side by side from her first check up and her last which were taken exactly 4 weeks apart. Elle looks completely different.

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She is really filling out. No more newborn diapers or clothes for her. She has outgrown them!

There aren’t a lot of updates. She smiles now, but it’s not often.

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She still sleeps about 18 hours a day.

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I did a little impromptu photo shoot of her on her 1 month birthday.

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I love that she was born close to the holidays. I think about how our birth story was so unconventional and I wonder how Mary must have felt and what her birth story would be like (of course we know the story, but not from the perspective of Mary).

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We have an important appointment coming up and I would love it if you would be in prayer for us during this time. I previously mentioned that Elle failed the newborn hearing screening. The first time they came in with the equipment to test her the tech lady had a unique personality and was rowdy. I think she was trying to be nice. For most people this is just a routine test. No reason to get too serious, but all kinds of faculty were coming in and out and joking around and making a racket so Elle woke up and was fussy for the second half of the test (the left side). So she failed on the left, but the boisterous tech assured us it was because she woke up and that’s all it was.

The next day a younger new tech came in while it was still dark and quiet in our hospital room. I asked if she could shut the door and maybe hang a do not disturb note or something. She looked at my like I was crazy, but at least it was a much more subdued and calmer atmosphere. She even let me nurse Elle during the test. Again Elle passed on the right, but she couldn’t even get a reading on the left. It was like it wasn’t hooked up right so the tech tried to adjust it. She never was able to figure out what was wrong so she said that she failed and she would refer us to an audiologist. I was hormonal, and tired, and obviously stressed so I sternly proclaimed “We have an audiologist. This is a big concern for us and I’d like to know what is going on” Then J and I asked more questions about the test. None of which she could answer. She looked really intimidated. She had never even heard of Connexin 26 which is the genetic hearing loss that we have in our family. It is the NUMBER ONE CAUSE of sensorineural deafness so you would think someone that tests for hearing loss would have some familiarity with it. I then asked to speak with a supervisor and  did, but she mostly just had some paperwork for me.

I immediately called SJ’s school and talked to our audiologist. She made me feel much better about the whole thing and gave me advice on how to proceed.


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I know a lot about hearing loss and I think Elle can hear. I feel very confident in that. I guess you could say we know she can because the test confirmed it on the right side. With Connexin 26 it is highly unlikely that it would be unilateral (only on one side) so chances are she is fine.

However, this whole thing brings up a lot of tender memories for me. We have to go through all the same testing that we did with SJ and we have to keep her asleep for 90 minutes which should be easy considering what I said about her sleep, but it’s still completely unpredictable and out of our control so that stresses me out.

I cried when I called and scheduled the appointment. I have openly expressed to people how I know that she is fine and it’s just a machine error which happens all the time. And hearing children do fail this test A LOT.

However, lately there have been other thoughts popping into my head that make me wonder why it was the left ear BOTH times. Maybe just a coincidence? I mean if something is going to go wrong with the test you have a 50/50 chance that it will be on the left side. Still part of me wonders if she has another problem on that side that doesn’t even have to do with Connexin 26. Or what if her hearing gets progressively worse, which can happen. What if she is one of those rare cases?

Luckily, most of these frantic thoughts didn’t really come into my mind until this week so at least I haven’t spent the past 4 weeks panicking.

Please pray that we get some answers with this test. I do have a peace about it, and all in all I think everything is going to be okay, but I hate the idea that if she doesn’t sleep we have to drag this out for another month or so. That would be terrible. I just want this to be over with.

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The reason I titled this “Awaiting the ABR… Again” is because I wrote another post about 3 1/2 years ago when I was waiting for this same test for SJ. You can read “Awaiting the ABR” to find out what the test is and what the waiting period was like for me in that time when I didn’t know for sure whether or not SJ was deaf. It feels like a world away.

Thanks for all the prayers and support. Of course I will keep you posted.

The Deaf Elephant in the Room

All of my pregnancies and deliveries have been just about textbook, but there is one aspect of my pregnancy that is unusual.

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It’s not something I want to make a big deal out of all, but I feel like it should be okay to acknowledge and talk about openly. The proverbial elephant in the room if you will.

My entire life I have been a carrier of a genetic mutation called connexin 26 and so has my husband, but we never knew it until three years ago. You may be a carrier of some kind of genetic abnormalities too. The thing about being a carrier is that it doesn’t affect you. From what I understand we all have genetic abnormalities. I believe it is approximately 1 in 50 people that have Cx26, if I remember correctly. I can’t seem to verify this information online so don’t quote me on that statistic. Anyway, it’s not all that uncommon, but like I said carrying only one copy of the gene doesn’t effect you, however if you have a child with someone else that has a copy of that gene you have a chance that you will pass one gene from each of you to that child. If the child has two copies of the mutated gene then they will be deaf. There are a lot of diseases and genetic abnormalities that work this way, so you may be familiar with the science behind it already.

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Here is how it works when you have Connexin 26.

We have a 1 in 4 chance of having a child that gets two copies of the normal genes which means no genetic hearing loss at all, not even carriers (as shown in blue). 

There is a 2 in 4 chance of having a child that receives 1 copy of the genetic mutation (shown in purple).

Lastly we have a 1 in 4 chance that the child will receive 2 copies of the genetic mutation and be deaf (shown in red). 

I wrote all about it here on the blog when I first found out.

We never suspected that SJ’s hearing loss was genetic because we had no history of deafness in either of our families. She had testing done just before my due date when I was pregnant with Ezie. I remember talking to our speech therapist saying that I didn’t know if I wanted the results before the baby came because if it was genetic then I would be worried. They assured me that I did not have to hear what the results were until I was ready and it could wait. My response to that was, yeah right I am not going to have the patience to wait one extra second for an answer! I was just too curious about how all of this happened. In the end the problem took care of itself. Ezie was born passing the hearing test and then about a week later I learned of our genetics so I didn’t have to worry.

I say all of that because this is the first pregnancy where I am well aware of my odds. This child could be deaf and I know it. In fact I know lots of families from SJ’s school that have proven that it doesn’t really matter what the statistics are. The chips will fall where they may (if that’s how you want to look at it). I know a Cx26 family where 2 of their 3 children are deaf, one where 2 of 2 are deaf, another that has 3 of 4 even! So even though J likes to joke that we have our 1 out of 4 so we’re done, it obviously doesn’t really work that way.

It’s nice to have other families in the school that I can talk to because they’ve been in my shoes. I know one mom whose first two children were deaf and the last one was not. She tried to make nothing of it, but she distinctly remembers her last baby going berserk in her belly when the fireworks were going off on the 4th of July and she felt like the baby must be able to hear. She was right. I know another mom who said that with her 2nd (out of 3) who was deaf she didn’t have any clues until after the baby was born, but she could tell almost immediately after knowing what to look for with her other two.

Honestly, it’s not something I think about too often. I am going to be fine with it either way, but of course we would love it if the extra challenge of hearing loss was not something that this child or our family has to face. I was reading recently in the updates about the baby that her hearing is fully developed now. The book encourages you to talk to your baby and play music for your baby. It says that the baby will be able to recognize our voices when she is born. I paused in that moment and just allowed the emotion to well up into tears.

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We do talk to our baby girl, and again I want to stress that Connexin 26 is not something I focus on, but the fact is- it’s a possibility. It’s information I never had to face when I was pregnant with the other three.

Who knows what will happen. The irony of all this is when SJ was a baby we had her vision tested because Z had such totally unexpected vision and eye problems when he was a baby that he actually had to have surgery. There we were. worried about her eye sight when it turns out that she had hearing loss the whole time! So the moment I think I prepare myself for one thing a completely different issue arises. All I know is that each one of our children are hand crafted by God. They are fearfully and wonderfully designed and he knows each of us in the womb. I put all of my trust in the Lord and I have a peace about it. I really do.

We will have the standard newborn screening at the hospital just like we did with Ezie. I probably won’t announce it right off the bat if there are any concerns. I just want the initial focus to be on the baby and all the fun aspects of birth announcements. If we do have anything that needs to be addressed medically, we’ll tell everyone soon enough after our family has had time to process things privately.

So that’s about it. I know that was a lot of info and this is quite a personal update, but I did want to get it out in the open. As far what we can tell so far the sweet little baby girl is healthy and the perfect measurements for my due date (which is 99 days away). I am 26 weeks and almost done with the 2nd trimester. She will be here before you know it. We are overjoyed.


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By |2015-08-17T18:44:39+00:00August 17, 2015|Special Needs|6 Comments
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