*WARNING* This post contains graphic images that are inappropriate and definitely unsuitable for children!!! Please, please, please proceed with caution!!!***

Does anyone else remember the children’s song “Oh be careful little eyes what you see… There’s a father up above and he’s looking down in love, so be careful little eyes what you see.” It’s a simple Biblical concept about guarding yourself and being aware of what you do and say and where you go.
I have had a message burning in my heart for some time now and my friend Amy inspired me to final say something.

She has been blogging about body image all week for NEDA (national eating disorder awareness). This topic is soooo important to me because I see the damaging effects that an unhealthy body image can have on young girls/women. They don’t value themselves so they become dangerous in what they will do as they struggle to find self worth. I went through a time in my life where I longed to be someone else. I really felt like I was hideous. I hated who I was and lost years of my life being distracted by this issue. I praise God for delivering me from the darkness that held me down in that period. I am grateful that although I don’t wake up every morning feeling like a beautiful creation, I know that I am loved and I am lovely.

I don’t think I need to state hundreds of statistics about how women are objectified in our society or how millions of women are suffering from eating disorders. We all know (I think we do) that this is a problem. We are responsible for the example we set for younger girls. Lets talk about what we can do about it. I don’t think there is anything wrong with exercise or wanting to look nice. I think obsessing over how we look and coveting other women’s bodies is a problem. You might think of lust as something guys do, but women lust over women’s bodies in other ways and it’s just as bad. I have had pinterest for a year now and I have to admit as much as I love the recipes and craft ideas I get fed up with some of the racy content that I see nearly everyday. If my child (or husband) was looking over my shoulder while I was scrolling through the pages I would have to close my web browser. You might be wondering who am I “following” that would show topless women or women in thongs. It’s coming from girls I grew up with and women including mothers from church and it’s pins about exercise. Really, that is all it is, but the images are often (in my opinion) unrealistic and offensive. These are just a couple examples that weren’t completely x rated, and I am sorry to be circulating the exact garbage I am trying to avoid, but I feel like it’s the only way to show you the content I am talking about. They might make you laugh or cringe, but if you are like me they will make you mad.

 LADIES! This woman is the only woman that looks exactly like this! Embrace individuality!

We’ve spent a lot of time focused on SJ’s ears lately. She had her 2nd (and final) cochlear implant activated yesterday. So she is hearing bilateral now. YEA! Thank God everything went smoothly and both surgeries were successful without any complications or infections. Ironically, baby E is the one that ended up with the ear trouble this week.

None of my kids have ever dealt with ear infections, so when E wasn’t acting like himself we couldn’t figure out what the problem was. He was so upset on Saturday night that on Sunday morning we kept him home from church even though he didn’t have a fever. I was worried that my easy going baby had turned into a colicky bundle of discontent and when the Doctor couldn’t get him in on Monday they suggesting bringing him to an urgent care so I did.

Sure enough the Doctor cringed when he looked in E’s ears. He has a double ear infection and ruptured eardrums. I have heard of people bursting their eardrums and I knew it was painful, but I never realized how common it is or that the eardrum heals itself. E didn’t burst his eardrums, for if he had it would have brought relief from the pressure, he did tear them though. I knew his cry sounded like he was in pain. J and I both agreed on that and our parenting instincts were right, but it’s still sad to confirm that the shrieking and screaming meant he was suffering.

The doctor and I talked for a bit and I learned that he and I are alike in that we are both really cautious and conservative when it comes to antibiotics especially with a little baby, but in this case there was no way around it. This makes E by far the youngest of my 3 children to ever be on antibiotics. Z and SJ were well past 2 years old when they had to take anything. Either way I am grateful there is a remedy for what he is dealing with. He hasn’t had any Tylenol today and he seems to be back to his usual bubble self, which means I am a little more bubbly too.

When we got home this cookie bouquet was sitting on the doorstep. It was from SJ’s school.

She was really excited about the delivery.

In my mini meltdown that was recently documented on this blog I referenced some behavioral issues we were dealing with. I know we just moved. Our schedules, schools, and environment have all changed and I can expect some set backs and back lashes from the kids, but I still don’t like it. Seriously, they are all 3 amazing and we actually have so many special and wonderful times together. I am really proud of each one of them, but then there are the other times! 

One of my best friends posted this the other day and I was actually downright convicted by it. 

Then as I was writing this I went to look up an article I found recently on how to raise a strong willed child and I think it is no coincidence that I came across this reminder instead

“God has given us the exact children in the exact birth order with the exact personalities not merely so that we can raise them but in order for them to be His tools in our lives to grow us up into the women He has created us to be. He gave us that strong willed toddler, that child we just don’t “’get,” that one with disabilities. Every child is a gift from God and He will use each one in our lives for good if we let Him. It’s helpful to ask, “God, what are you teaching me through this special child of mine?” God is full of mercy and full of grace. And He is always faithful.”

-Susan Yates

I just happened to see it in my online search and it speaks volumes to me! It actually made me cry, which is what I do these days. Thank you Lord for teaching me.

Jenga! Have you ever played this game? You’ve got a stack of rectangular blocks and you take turns trying to remove a block from the stack and balance it on top without having it fall over. 
That is what my life feels like right now.

We just finished our first full week of this new routine. We live in Northern Kentucky now and travel 45 minutes north for SJ’s school in Ohio 5 days a week. We also have appointments in Louisville that we have to travel an hour south for. I think I am starting to get a grasp on how to get around this area. I’ve also managed to get the kids to bed and out the door on time everyday. All things considered it’s been an extremely smooth transition, but there have been days I’ve feel like I’m done. It’s my turn and every block I reach for is the one that will send the Jenga tower tumbling to the ground.

I’m trying to remember to take it a day at a time. I’ll admit though, I am exhausted. I feel it when I’ve made my 3rd lap around the new Kroger trying to figure out where the throat coat tea is located. Or when one more person mentions how I have my hands full and I tell myself not to scowl because they don’t realize that I’ve been told that by three other people that day. And sometimes I just cry or I take it out on my poor husband. I get depressed and want to quit. I feel selfish even admitting this. Yeah we have a lot on our plate, but we have so much to be thankful for. I think I am just in transition shock right now.

There have been some really challenging fights I’ve faced lately with bills and red tape  and children’s behavior issues. There are times I have wanted to get online and emotionally vomit all over my blog. I know that analogy is really appealing, and goes to show how grateful I am that I have used some restraint. However, I think it’s good to be a bit transparent from time to time. I am admitting that I am overwhelmed. I am confident that the Lord is faithful as always and we will get through this season. I need to read over the verses that everyone submitted because this is exactly why I asked for them and they are so good. Like this one Amy sent really applies to all I am feeling right now!  “When anxious thoughts multiply within me, Your consolations delight my soul.” (Psalm 94:19)

Baby Ezie got his first two teeth this month. I think it’s quite a coinsidence that the boys are 5 years (and 27 days) apart and Z lost his first two teeth a month before E got his first two teeth in, and of course it’s the same bottom two. So now both boys have the same two teeth growing in. I am going to go ahead and say my prediction, which is that E will loose those teeth exactly 5 years from now.

I don’t have any photos of the teeth, but I did manage to do his 3 month photo shoot and even though he wasn’t charming my camera to pieces I still managed to get this adorable shot of him as his usual laid back self.

His latest milestone is the whole hand fascination stage. He just loves to lock his fingers together, open and close his fists, and zero in on his hands with the intensity of a antique appraiser.

And no, the camera does not add pounds, he really is that chunky. He was 16 pounds last time he was weighed and that was a few weeks ago so who knows how much he is now. He has just about outgrown all of his 3-6 month clothes. In fact here is a picture of me on my 30th birthday with a onesie I got for him in NYC.

 I did pictures of all of the kids in their I heart NY shirts and I couldn’t button Es because he was too long!

It’s amazing how much changed in the 6 months between these two photos.  Just think what he’ll be like in another 6 months! No actually, let’s not think about that. It will be here way too soon.