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Z’s Growing Up

*Not sure why half of this is in all caps!? I have tried to change it, but it’s stuck that way for now. Oh well. 

Z came downstairs yesterday morning with his glasses off, his pajamas still on, and his finger in his mouth. “Look” he said as he wiggled his two bottom teeth. At first I panicked and asked him what happened. He said “I just went to sleep and now they are wiggly”. My mom said  “It sounds like someone is ready for his first encounter with the tooth fairy.” We all got really excited and even SJ stopped eating breakfast to give Z a hug. 

I just can’t believe how much he is changing and maturing. I am loving this age. The other day I had to go to the store with the kids and I purposefully picked Z up from school first rather than go with just the two little ones. I never thought I would see the day that Z would be more of an asset than a liability, no offense. It seems like only yesterday shoppers were gawking at me as I abandoned my shopping cart full of groceries to chase my holy terror through the freezer aisle.  

Granted he still challenges us with his antics. If it’s not one bad habit it’s another. He used to bite the collar of his shirt. Then he went through a stage where he started asking “what’d you say?” after EVERYTHING to the point that we even talked to SJ’s ear doctor thinking maybe he had hearing problems. His latest most irritating habit has been blowing in peoples faces, but I think he is over that one now too. I only mention these things because I don’t want to give off the impression that I have an angelic 5 year old. 

His teachers think that he is, and I am not quite sure how he pulled that one off. He has some amazing teachers and does so well in the classroom setting. When we moved out to the country I worried about the lack of peer interaction, but school has filled that void. He is learning to read and has the most beautiful thirst for knowledge. When I read to him he wants to see how many of the words he can read himself. He will take the word van and sound it out very slowly and I just wait. 
Vuh.  Aaaaa. Nuh. 
Vvvvah-nuh. 
Vana? 
VAN! 

And when it clicks and he realized he took letters and decoded it into a word he just lights up. It is such an amazing experience as a mom to see the wheels turn and watch him grow up. It’s one of the perks of my job and I love it. 

By |2015-05-14T23:15:38+00:00December 12, 2012|Uncategorized|6 Comments
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Sedona Hears

When SJ got her hearing aids her Doctor described the best possible outcome as a “Disney moment”. It’s one that is sweet and magical. We did not have that reaction at all and I blogged about my slight disappointed. Then when we went in to have the cochlear implant turned on I left disappointed again. In fact I cried all the way home.

Then nearly 2 weeks later this happened…

What may look insignificance was a huge milestone for SJ. It was exactly 6 months ago that I was feeling discouraged by the results of the hearing. My friend {Amy} left this comment on my post “praying for that Disney moment to come soon” and I can now testify that it has!

This video has been shared on my Facebook, twitter, and youtube and the responses have been such an encouragement. I wanted to share some of them, not to say see how awesome everyone thinks we are, but to give glory to God because he is worthy!

“oh my! sooo beautiful! I literally said, “Yaayyy” when she did it (while crying) You are doing such an amazing job with her. God gave her the perfect Mommy!”

That’s amazing!

Wow!!! Wow, Wow, Wow!!!

Brought tears to my eyes! The sound of the letter B never sounded so sweet 

That is amazing. Gave me chills.

That is beyond GREAT!!

So precious! Rejoicing with you guys!

Oh my goodness! That’s awesome! It made me cry watching her. She is so smart!

Not gonna lie… I literally just cried. 

Man, that was just beautiful!

This made me cry!! She is so perfect and God is so good!! I love y’all!!!!

Oh wow! Brought me to TEARS! I’m so happy you shared and the joy and love in your face was so special!!!

“Sedona has been on our staff prayer lists since her diagnosis. My boss, has 5 grand kids under the age of 4. He says this hits too close to home with the age of kids. Every week, he asks for an update. Today, when I showed him the video, he just started crying. Of course, so was I. I can only imagine how you both feel when you see and HEAR Sedona hear and talk.”

One of SJ’s therapist wants to use the video as an illustration and my sister-in-laws pastor is using the video for a Bible study he is doing. We sent the video to SJ’s audiologist and apparently it made it’s way to the surgeon because my youtube account had a message from him too! This quiet spontaneous moment with SJ was special to me of course, but I had no idea the impact it would have on so many others. To God be the glory!  
By |2015-05-14T23:15:38+00:00December 10, 2012|Uncategorized|4 Comments
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Month 2

It’s been a beautiful two months of having Ezie in our lives. I don’t know his current weight, but he is a big guy. I just started putting him in the 3-6 month clothes. He is still an excellent sleeper, but awake more often during the day than he was last month. He’s never slept through the night, but the couple of times he does want to eat in the middle of the night he is just barely awake and then goes right back to sleep (same goes for me). I still can’t tell if he is going to be a pacifier baby or not. At this point he doesn’t take to it too much. He is holding his head up really well and he is “tracking” with his eyes. He also started smiling, which means a room full of  grown adults  will act incredibly ridiculous just to try and win a smirk.

He makes you work for them too, let me tell ya. 

We got the traditional ducky photo of him wearing the robe that I bought for a dollar at a yard sale 6 years ago. It was the first baby item I purchased when I was pregnant with Z. I now have photos with each of my kids wearing it after bath time.  
When I was a baby my eyes stayed blue until I was a year and a half! My nieces eyes were this way too, so it must run in the family to have late bloomers when it comes to brown eyes. E’s eyes seem REALLY blue, but I won’t count on them staying that way. It would be cool though if they did because both his grandfather and great grandfather, which he was named after, have blue eyes. Either way, I will always have these snapshots of his baby blues. 
By |2015-05-14T23:15:38+00:00December 8, 2012|Uncategorized|5 Comments
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Blanket of White

When I think of white I think of Christmas, wedding dresses, and my old Volvo. When I saw that Studio JRU color project theme was white I decided to join in.



Some of my favorite photographs are mainly white and this first one was featured at a couple different local art shows. It was taken at the White Sands in Alamagordo New Mexico in August of 2006.  

To give some perspective let’s back up a little. 

Visiting the white sands has to be one of my most memorable travel experiences. It was pure uninterrupted hills of whiteness for miles and miles. It felt so foreign like it didn’t even belong, but there it is smack dab in the southwestern part of the good ol’ U.S. It’s like God told the Sahara they needed to share and scooped up a bucket to give to New Mexico. 
Now let’s skip over about 5 states to the middle of Kentucky where we’ve spent many of our family Christmases. Kentucky gets it’s fair share of snow in the winter, but it’s certainly not a guaranteed white Christmas. However in 2011 we were lucky enough to have an all out winter wonderland. It was SJ’s first Christmas and she loved the snow. This one of her and the mailbox is a favorite of mine. She is there. Look closely. 

Let’s look at another perspective again, so that you can see a little more of her.

It’s amazing how two totally different locations at opposite times of year could be so similar all because of that blanket of white. 

By |2015-05-14T23:15:38+00:00December 5, 2012|Uncategorized|8 Comments
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Miscellany Monday

This is my first time linking up with Miscellany Monday, but I have plenty of randomness to throw out there so I thought, why not?

1. When I did this Christmas Tree countdown with Z he said the tree was missing something.

 When I asked him what, he said “the thing on the bottom that helps keep the tree warm.” He was referring to the tree skirt. I thought it was a cute concept. The tree needs a little blankie to stay warm.

2. SJ responded to her name yesterday for the first time! I’ve waited almost 3 years for this (for those that are new to my blog, my daughter SJ got a cochlear implant last month. So she is technically learning to listen). She was sprinkling cinnamon and sugar on her toast and she was putting on way too much so I called out her name and she acted startled and turned around. She may not have known that it was her name, but she definitely responded to the sound. I was so excited that I didn’t want to follow up by taking away the cinnamon shaker so I just gave her a bowl to sprinkle it in that way she didn’t have a mountain of cinnamon on top of her toast. It was a beautiful moment I will always remember.

3. Did you know Pinterest has secret boards now? It’s true. I got a text about it from my best friend and I was so grateful because it came in handy today when I started pinning gift ideas. This is something that I could have used earlier this year when I was pregnant, but hadn’t announced it yet. I’m sure it could come in handy for a lot of things. Yea for secret boards!

4. I have seen this viral video all over social media, so I am sure it’s old news, but just in case you missed it, this parent rap is really cute. 

I’ve had several people tell me that the mom in the video reminds them of me. Some say it’s the facial expressions. I think any long haired brunette acting crazy, chasing around a bunch of kids could potentially be mistaken for me. On a side note one of my friends knows this girl and informed me that the couple in the video are not actually a couple. They had me fooled!

5. We made gingerbread men, which was a first for the kids and for me.

6. I’m loving the live Christmas tree at my parents house. The truth is though, if we had our own place right now we would be using our fake tree. I am all about all things natural, earthy, unique, and authentic, except when it comes to the Christmas tree. The watering, the disposal, the pine needles, and worst of all the price is just too hard for me to justify. I feel terrible even admitting that because it really isn’t my personality. In the future we’ll probably change it up from year to year. J wants to cut down his own tree sometime. What about you? Real or fake? Um, Christmas tree?

By |2015-05-14T23:15:38+00:00December 3, 2012|Uncategorized|3 Comments
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December 1st

This time last year we were in the middle of trying to remodel and sell our house and I was a GRINCH! This year I am determined to be jolly. With all the festivities we have going on it hasn’t been too hard to get into the holiday spirit.

So far we have picked out the perfect tree

and then decorated all nine feet of it.

We only had to sweep up broken ornaments a couple of times, which isn’t bad considering all 5 of the cousins are ages 5 and under.


This is the only photo I have from that nights with all 5 of them 


Yesterday we managed to mail out our Christmas cards. This is the earliest we’ve ever sent them.

 

Then today we did a Christmas tree countdown craft.


Thanks for holding that for me baby E.

All I had to do was print the tree and we just happened to have a pack of glittery pipe cleaners already. So we cut them up and made 24 ornaments and a star. Z will be able to stick one on the tree everyday leading up to Christmas. This is what it will like like at the end.

Now I don’t have to do the math when he asks me how many days until Christmas.

Tonight we are cooking and decorating ginger bread cookies. It’s definitely beginning to look a lot like Christmas!

By |2015-05-14T23:15:38+00:00December 2, 2012|Uncategorized|2 Comments
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Preschool Pressure!

I’ve always been the non-preschool mom. I feel like with 13 + years of formal structured education and then onto adulthood I don’t see any reason to rush into things (for my kids). However, it’s different with SJ.  She is going to need extra help from people that are trained in working with hearing loss. She is in an early intervention program already. Once she turns 3 (in 3 months) she will begin full time preschool. I am completely out of my element when it comes to applying to preschool. Everything I do know comes from the quirky documentary Nursery University.

Fortunately we do not live in Manhattan where the competition is one spot for every 15 applicants. Still, much like the documentary depicts, it does feel similar to trying to get into college. There’s the funding, the location, and eligibility. I have had a couple consultations with two different schools already and I just got off the phone with SJ’s service coordinator who called to set up another meeting.

 There are 3 schools that want to enroll SJ. She could go to the public school where she would be thrown in a special ed program with 20 other kids with varying special needs. I have been strongly advised by her Doctors that we should not go this route, but I still met with them because the public school could potentially fund her private school education depending on what hoops we jump through. The other options are both deaf oral schools. She has play group at one in Louisville that I absolutely love, but the location is further from everything that we moved here for. The 3rd option is moving to Ohio where there is another private school for the deaf. We’ve had the tour and been faxing and mailing forms back and forth to get things started. This school would still be considerably further from where we want to be, but within an hour from the church and family so it’s doable.

It’s a big decision and I want what is best for the entire family. J and I both feel like that would be the Ohio school so that’s all set. Except wait, we need a job, and a place to live, and a school for Z! Well, it looks like we are going to have to fully expect God to come through for us. Something I have plenty of practice in, but still am challenged by. I humbly ask that you would join in prayer with us (AGAIN) as we seek wisdom and direction for this next stage in our lives.

Mathew 17:20  Truly I tell you, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you.”

By |2015-05-14T23:15:38+00:00November 29, 2012|Uncategorized|3 Comments
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Her First Week Hearing

As we loaded up the car last Thursday to go have Thanksgiving dinner with friends and family we had all the more reason to be thankful. It had been only 24 hours before that we sat in the audiologists office as  they hooked SJ up to the device that allowed her to hear. 
 This audiogram shows where her hearing was the last time she was tested (pink), where her hearing is now (green), and the yellow shows what speech sounds she can hear. She’s going from barely being able to hear a helicopter at 100 decibels to currently being able to hear a conversation at 30 decibels!  
This lovely lady is SJ’s audiologist as she was working on SJ’s first mapping. 
Mapping is a way of tweaking and setting the sounds that she will hear through her processor. She still isn’t receiving all the benefits of the implant, but she will gradually be given a little more sound over the next few months in order to allow her brain to adjust to it. The little arrow in the photo above is pointing to the case that her processor goes in, and the bigger arrow is pointing to the bag that we were sent home with. That huge bag is full of all kinds of accessories (including the remote control for the processor), wires, and booklets full of information all for this one little piece of equipment! I’ll admit, it is a scary amount of responsibility. Thank God that I am not alone in all of this. 

Normally the sound processor would hang over SJ’s right ear a lot like a hearing aid, but since SJ is still healing from the surgery she had three weeks ago we are just using her pony tail as a way of keeping it on. The coil is the transmitter that has a magnet on it which attaches to the magnet that is under her skin. Yes, it is weird. I still haven’t become totally comfortable with knowing exactly where it is located on her head. Once that magnet is close to the right spot you can feel it stick. It attaches just like a refrigerator magnet. 
Even though we know that SJ is hearing significantly more than she ever has, she still isn’t responding to much. Our speech just sounds like a bunch of garble to her right now and everything from music to a dog bark has no meaning at all. One of the books that I read says this regarding the activation of the CI 
“Parents must realize that the surgeon’s job has ended and the long term work of helping their child listen with the implant has just begun. Parents who abdicate their responsibilities at home, in light of what they believe is a medical miracle, will be disappointed with the outcome.” 
In other words, this isn’t a quick fix where she now hears and is just like any other child. We have a lot of work ahead of us. 
Right now it is projected that it should take about 3 years just to get SJ caught up. That means by the time she is 7 hopefully she will be mainstreamed. Until then we are currently working on getting her enrolled at a deaf school (which is another huge ordeal I’ll have to expound on in another post). From what I can tell the cochlear implant journey so far has been a lot like parenting; it’s a big responsibility that is very exciting, but can also be exhausting. With both parenting and the cochlear implant I am 100% committed and look forward to seeing what is in store. Thank you so much for all of the prayers and to everyone who has been there to cheer us on as we venture into the unknown, believing that God has big plans for this precious child. 
                                     

This is one of the finest things I can think of, so I am linking up with Finer Things Friday over at Amy’s Finer Things! 
By |2015-05-14T23:15:38+00:00November 28, 2012|Uncategorized|3 Comments
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Pajama Pics

The day we found out that we were having a boy I went on a little shopping spree to buy some boy things and I found a little sleeper that matched one that Z got for Christmas last year. He calls them his Rock Band pajamies. I got out my camera the other day so I could get a few pics of them matching, because both of them are on the verge of no longer fitting into the snugly guitar PJ’s. 
In the meantime while the flash is firing SJ gets her messy face in there wearing nothing but undies. 
She was really hamming it up. 
It was the first picture I have of the 3 of them together and other than the nudity it was picture perfect. So I threw some footie pajamas on SJ hoping to capture this charming moment with my three little cuddle bugs, but…
 I should have known the moment would not last that long. Oh well.
 I did manage to get this cuddle bug action Thanksgiving morning. Co-sleeping at it’s finest. We usually start out with the bed to ourselves. The pile up happens gradually over the coarse of the night when we are the most vulnerable. 
 It’s like one big pajama party. That’s how we roll.
By |2015-05-14T23:15:38+00:00November 24, 2012|Uncategorized|5 Comments
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What To Expect When You Expect Hearing

We are about 10 days away from SJ having her cochlear implant activated. Right now SJ has the internal device, but that doesn’t mean anything without the sound processor, which is typically given 3 weeks after implantation. When scheduling the activation the Doctor gave me several dates to choose from. I had to pause for a moment to let it all sink in. I am selecting the day that my daughter will hear. They actually call it her hearing birthday. She will start hearing from that day forward. I chose the soonest date possible of course!

Am I excited? Yes, absolutely, but to be honest I’m guarded.  This isn’t the first time I have expected SJ to hear. The first time was after the initial sound booth test. I felt confident that she was not deaf. We left the ENT’s office doing our own hearing evaluations. We would ring bells, shout her name, look for reactions as airplanes flew overhead and she never responded. One time I went in the bedroom where Z and SJ were still asleep and I banged some pans together loudly. Neither one of them woke up so that experiment was kind of a wash. Then we got the hearing aids and when they turned them on they said it would be gradual because they wanted her to be able to adjust to hearing. Sometimes I thought I saw her making progress with the hearing aids, but still nothing significant.

I feel like I have spent the past 8 months trying to catch flecks of dust floating in the sunlight. I want to reach for something and really be able to grab onto it. I want to know that she hears and I am hoping it will not take extensive detective work to be able to recognize it. J and I have been given a lot of information from her team preparing us for the realistic and even then there has been some confusion about what to expect when they turn the implant on. In order to alleviate some of this confusion for us and everyone else I emailed her Doctor. This is part of what she said in response.

The first day is different for everyone.  When I turn on the implant,
she may hear beeps, bells, or whistles at first.  Or she may hear
voices that sound more like Charlie Brown’s teacher or mushy speech,
or it may sound close to normal. I would suspect that our voices will sound
more like Charlie Brown’s teacher for the first week or so. Then,
after she is wearing it consistently, voices and speech will sound
more normal. 

She will be able to hear soft sounds, voices, airplanes-all on
the first day. No sound will be too loud, because I will control that
volume on the implant.  Her “hearing” with the implant will be normal
or close to normal when the CI is on.  She may not be able to
understand what you are saying right off with the implant although she
is technically hearing you, but the understanding part will follow
shortly.

Right when I turn the implant on, she may have an awesome reaction,
like pointing to her ear, laughing, etc. or she may have a not so
great reaction, like crying.  Like I said before, every child reacts a
different way.  Basically, expect any reaction as a sign that she is
hearing!

So that is what you can expect from SJ on her hearing birthday, and you can expect me to be a nervous wreck. I would say I don’t want to get my hopes up, but to quote one of my favorite lines from Monk “That’s what hopes are for.” 

By |2023-06-12T06:19:26+00:00November 19, 2012|Hearing Aids, Uncategorized|3 Comments
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