In my mini meltdown that was recently documented on this blog I referenced some behavioral issues we were dealing with. I know we just moved. Our schedules, schools, and environment have all changed and I can expect some set backs and back lashes from the kids, but I still don’t like it. Seriously, they are all 3 amazing and we actually have so many special and wonderful times together. I am really proud of each one of them, but then there are the other times! 

One of my best friends posted this the other day and I was actually downright convicted by it. 

Then as I was writing this I went to look up an article I found recently on how to raise a strong willed child and I think it is no coincidence that I came across this reminder instead

“God has given us the exact children in the exact birth order with the exact personalities not merely so that we can raise them but in order for them to be His tools in our lives to grow us up into the women He has created us to be. He gave us that strong willed toddler, that child we just don’t “’get,” that one with disabilities. Every child is a gift from God and He will use each one in our lives for good if we let Him. It’s helpful to ask, “God, what are you teaching me through this special child of mine?” God is full of mercy and full of grace. And He is always faithful.”

-Susan Yates

I just happened to see it in my online search and it speaks volumes to me! It actually made me cry, which is what I do these days. Thank you Lord for teaching me.

Jenga! Have you ever played this game? You’ve got a stack of rectangular blocks and you take turns trying to remove a block from the stack and balance it on top without having it fall over. 
That is what my life feels like right now.

We just finished our first full week of this new routine. We live in Northern Kentucky now and travel 45 minutes north for SJ’s school in Ohio 5 days a week. We also have appointments in Louisville that we have to travel an hour south for. I think I am starting to get a grasp on how to get around this area. I’ve also managed to get the kids to bed and out the door on time everyday. All things considered it’s been an extremely smooth transition, but there have been days I’ve feel like I’m done. It’s my turn and every block I reach for is the one that will send the Jenga tower tumbling to the ground.

I’m trying to remember to take it a day at a time. I’ll admit though, I am exhausted. I feel it when I’ve made my 3rd lap around the new Kroger trying to figure out where the throat coat tea is located. Or when one more person mentions how I have my hands full and I tell myself not to scowl because they don’t realize that I’ve been told that by three other people that day. And sometimes I just cry or I take it out on my poor husband. I get depressed and want to quit. I feel selfish even admitting this. Yeah we have a lot on our plate, but we have so much to be thankful for. I think I am just in transition shock right now.

There have been some really challenging fights I’ve faced lately with bills and red tape  and children’s behavior issues. There are times I have wanted to get online and emotionally vomit all over my blog. I know that analogy is really appealing, and goes to show how grateful I am that I have used some restraint. However, I think it’s good to be a bit transparent from time to time. I am admitting that I am overwhelmed. I am confident that the Lord is faithful as always and we will get through this season. I need to read over the verses that everyone submitted because this is exactly why I asked for them and they are so good. Like this one Amy sent really applies to all I am feeling right now!  “When anxious thoughts multiply within me, Your consolations delight my soul.” (Psalm 94:19)

Baby Ezie got his first two teeth this month. I think it’s quite a coinsidence that the boys are 5 years (and 27 days) apart and Z lost his first two teeth a month before E got his first two teeth in, and of course it’s the same bottom two. So now both boys have the same two teeth growing in. I am going to go ahead and say my prediction, which is that E will loose those teeth exactly 5 years from now.

I don’t have any photos of the teeth, but I did manage to do his 3 month photo shoot and even though he wasn’t charming my camera to pieces I still managed to get this adorable shot of him as his usual laid back self.

His latest milestone is the whole hand fascination stage. He just loves to lock his fingers together, open and close his fists, and zero in on his hands with the intensity of a antique appraiser.

And no, the camera does not add pounds, he really is that chunky. He was 16 pounds last time he was weighed and that was a few weeks ago so who knows how much he is now. He has just about outgrown all of his 3-6 month clothes. In fact here is a picture of me on my 30th birthday with a onesie I got for him in NYC.

 I did pictures of all of the kids in their I heart NY shirts and I couldn’t button Es because he was too long!

It’s amazing how much changed in the 6 months between these two photos.  Just think what he’ll be like in another 6 months! No actually, let’s not think about that. It will be here way too soon.

I’ve been thrown into the world of preschool all at once this year.

In the past 6 months I have learned a lot about being a mother to preschoolers.

First of all, I have learned it is kind of a pain to have back up clothes available. Every preschool wants you to have a change of clothes for your kiddo in case they wet their pants, throw up, or spill milk all over themselves (I know about two out three of these from experience). It’s not really that big of a deal, but for someone as thrifty and disinterested in laundry as I am it’s a little painful knowing that a whole set of “seasonably appropriate” clothing are inaccessibly stored away in a cubby at school.

I have also learned not get too creative when it comes to bringing class goodies. Have you heard of Pinstrosity? It’s a blog that features Pinterest projects gone wrong. I laugh and cry and relate to so much of the subject matter on that site and I have always wanted to submit Z’s birthday cupcakes. The idea was to make cupcakes that looked like Super Mario mushrooms.

The results were… uh… less than ideal.

There were no cupcakes at his school that day, but I think I learned my lesson.

The biggest, most unexpected thing that I’ve learned from these preschool days is dealing with the impact my children’s teachers (or therapists)  have had not only on Z and SJ, but on me. It’s been an emotional time of goodbyes for our family. Both schools sent my kids off with special treats, gifts, and most importantly words of empowerment encouraging them as they walked out the doors of the school and onward into their bright futures.

I feel blessed beyond words to have had the opportunity to meet some of these wonderful, beautiful ladies that worked with both of my children. To steal words from the letter I wrote to SJ’s therapist they have been and will always be such an important part of our lives even though our time together may have been brief. 

Moving in the middle of the school year like this has been really difficult for me, but God placed the right teachers in our path once I know he can do it again. And while I am on the subject I would like to extend this thank you to all the teachers out there that commit their time, energy, and love to our children. You probably don’t even know what a difference you make in the world. Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!

It’s been a while since I have updated what is happening with SJ and A LOT is happening, so I will do my best to get everyone caught up.

First off we are moving. In October we toured a deaf school in Ohio and felt like it was a great place for SJ to learn and develop with her new cochlear implant. I know I have mentioned it before, but getting the device is only half the battle. It takes years of therapy and training to make the whole operation worth while and give a child the opportunity to hear and speak. This facility seems like a wonderful resource for her, but it is an hour and a half away so we are going to move in with my brother and his wife. We will still be about 40 minutes from the school, but this will get us one step closer so that SJ can begin classes and J can find a job in the area. We are nervous, but excited about this next endeavor.

SJ starts at her new school in a couple weeks. It really is a dream school. She will have students just like her to learn beside. She will get private time with a speech therapist. There are two activity centers. One mimics a house where everything is toddler sized. This is a way for SJ to learn about all of her environment like dishes, dress up, laundry, bedtime. They even hang photos up of the student’s families. The other activity center focuses on a different theme each month.  When we were there it was farm. They had a little barn and  real hay bails. The children play games learning about animals and farm related vocabulary. Last month the theme was restaurant where they learned about food and mealtime.

I was hesitant about putting SJ in preschool, because I really cherish the toddler age as a time that I have to teach my kids and have them at home with me, but she has special needs and needs special support. I was really pleased with the environment at the school. I don’t have to worry about her childhood being consumed with therapy because they have an extremely fun, loving, playful approach to it. They keep the parents involved on so many levels and I like that too. I know she’s going to love it. I’ve compared it to going to Sesame street!

The other BIG BIG news is that a month from now SJ will have bilateral hearing. This means that she is having her second cochlear implant (the left side) put in on February 14th. We wanted this from the beginning. In fact we wanted her to have a simultaneous bilateral implantation, which surgeons are doing more and more of these days, but our ENT does not. While I do not look forward to having to go through the surgery itself, I feel extremely blessed that SJ will be able to have “two ears”.

It’s all good news and yet a slightly terrifying. I feel like I am preparing my self for the trenches and asking God for a lot of endurance. The quote that comes to mind is “How do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time”. It’s a weird saying.

I don’t want to eat an elephant, but the point is we are going to tackle these transitions as they come, one step and one day at a time.

Do you have a favorite verse that encourages you in stressful times? I would love for you to share it. 

What I have found about the third child is that while I still work really hard at keeping things even when it comes documenting memories, it’s definitely a challenge. I have managed to do newborn portraits, video collages, baby book entries, and birth announcements for all of them, but E’s tends to get done a little later and perhaps less detailed.

E is now 3 months 3 1/2 months old. He had his first Christmas.

He is obviously really excited about it.

 We didn’t do any pictures with Santa this year, but I was able to get some of the kids all dressed up in their Christmas clothes.

E played the role of baby Jesus a total of 4 times this year, including once at the mall for a flash mob. 
People that we didn’t even know where stopping us to take pictures and tell us how much they enjoyed the surprise program. If babies could get academy awards I think E would be some serious competition for best performance as a tranquil newborn. Even when laid in a manager under a spotlight he was always so serene. I knew he would do well considering he isn’t typically a fussy baby, I was more concerned about him being gassy. Thankfully there was no flatulation going on during the angelic nativity scene.

As far as the rest of the month goes, he started cooing which is the most precious thing in the world.
He had his first plane ride.  He was on a plane for the first time.
He got sick for the first time, but I took him to the Doctor and it turns out he just has a cold and I am glad about that.

That’s about it for the 3 month milestones. He mostly just lays around 24/7 melting our hearts with his snuggly, adorable, squishiness. It’s a tough job, but somebodies gotta do it.

You can imagine with my passionate stance on life that I was a little excited to see this cover story 

1. The smaller number of doctors willing to perform abortions.
2. Widespread access to birth control.
3.  Changing attitudes about family. For example being pregnant out of wedlock isn’t as taboo as it used to be.
4. State Regulations becoming more restrictive. There were 92 restricting provisions passed in 2011.
5. New discoveries about fetuses. Scientific progress has played a major roll in the shifting of public opinion. A mother can now see and hear a heartbeat before she were to have an abortion. Mothers can see the tiny human on ultrasound. Some babies born prematurely can live as young as 24 weeks! None of this information or opportunities were available 40 years ago when abortion was legalized.