This whole Kindergarten, First grade, homeschool, public school fiasco has been a little embarrassing. I feel like such a weirdo. I could just do what I’m told and take orders from the government on how to educate, vaccinate, and give birth to my children, but no I have to make everything so difficult. And it might look like I am trying to make things difficult or that I am trying to make a statement, but I am really not. I am to the point right now that I would like to take a break from being the maverick.

 In High School I think I was completely confident with being an individual. I didn’t want to be mainstream and was looking for ways to add pizzaz and spunk to my life, like have a picnic on top of a car. I have a photo of that somewhere. Now, I don’t need to do that anymore, my kids have enough individuality and spontaneity to last me a lifetime. EVERYDAY or more like every hour I am dealing with stuff like this

or this

or this

and then some.

So when I make choices like home birth or do things like homeschool my son for Kindergarten it is not because I am seeking individuality. In fact I would love more than an anything to be able to blend in a little bit.

As far as our schooling decision is concerned I was just about in tears talking to my husband and wondering why I have to make everything so difficult. I told him I was ready to be the good suburban soccer mom and not have to fight anymore. He said “Well, you can’t do that.” and I said “Why not?” I expected him to say something about the family I come from, or how he won’t let me, but what he said struck me. He said because you have conviction. It’s true. Even my faith isn’t all that popular now that I’m removed from the Bible belt, but it doesn’t matter because those are my convictions.

I’ve talked with several women about homeschooling and got some great feed back. I started looking into a supplementary homeschool program in the area (I called it “subsidized in my last blog post, I need to edit that). In the end though, it was going to cost a lot of money and take a lot more restructuring just to have some regular peer interaction for Z if I homeschooled. I could just put Zion in Kindergarten for half the day and allow him to be with other kids (for free) and then the other half of the day I can teach him and do projects with him and just forget the label of grade level. One thing I have learned from all of this homeschool research is that it is less about testing and ranking, and more about the joy of learning. I am going to apply that to Z’s education for the year. So in a way I am choosing both, although for all practical purposes Z is in public school and he is a kindergartener. We are actually about to head out right now to go inside his school for the first time and pick up the welcome pack.

One little disclaimer before I go. When I say I have convictions about how I raise my children, they are personal convictions. I am in no way implying that parents that do do things the more conventional way are not fighting for their kids. I think we all have our own battles. Most parents are just striving for what is best for their families individually and it’s different for everyone. Whether it’s homeschool, private school, deaf school, special ed, or private school I hope you all have the best school year ever!